A whispered apology
by jazzberry
Summary: Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. B/E/T AU/AH Em/R A/J
1. Sick and tired

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there life and fix there marriage.

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"The heart of a cheater  
is empty and hollow" - **Unknown**

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"Happy Anniversary," Our family said, as Edward and I walked on to the stage.

All there smiling faces made me feel like the most pathetic person on the planet. Here I am walking on stage with my husband pretending that we have a happy marriage, well we don't. The last three years have been a nightmare for me. Every time I look at Edward's face I feel like I'm going to be sick. He's been cheating on me for three years, i haven't been clueless about his infidelity, I know. At first i tried ignore it it, turn the blind eye but after a while i just couldn't. I tried everything, different things in order to make our sex life exciting, marriage counseling, and I even started to give him oral even though i hate it but, he still didn't stop. I've asked him plenty of times is it me he just looks at me and walks out of the room. I know Edward has a girlfriend, I even know her name Tanya Denali. She is Edward's receptionist. I thought it was the most exciting thing in the world when my husband opened up his private clinic but, i can see now that's when our troubles began. Edward doesn't even try to hide that he's cheating on me anymore. Whenever Tanya calls his cellphone he just walks out of the room, even if where in the middle of a conversation. I want to leave him so badly but i love him, I'm a damn fool for still caring but i do. I know he sleeps at her house when he says hes always on call, i know because i went down there and they told me Dr. Cullen hasn't been there all day. I knew, but i didn't want to believe. Now here we are a supposed 6 years of marital bliss nothing but lies.

"Thanks everyone," Edward smiled as he pulls me to his side. "Bella and I would like to thank everyone who came here tonight to celebrate will us".

"Speech" Emmett called out. _God please don't tell me his brother is drunk again._

Everyone else began to murmur there agreement. When Tanya walked in. She scanned the room quickly finding Edward on stage and began to smile. I watched as Edward looked at me then at her and he leaned close and whispered in my ear.

"Bella you can give the speech right, I'll be back" He attempted to kiss me on the cheek but i moved away.

Edward walked off the stage leaving me to explain to everyone where he was going. _Evey one my husband is about to go have sex with his mistress in one of the bathrooms, Cheers._

"Sorry, Edward had to use the bathroom apparently he couldn't hold it". I laughed.

Everyone laughed at my joke, I watched Edward kiss her on lips and walk to the bathrooms. The only people to follow my line of vision was my sister Alice and my cousin Rosalie. Everyone else was oblivious to what was going on around them.

"Everyone thank you, its been 6 wonderful years of marriage. I could not have asked for a better husband. We fight just like every other couple but when those really tough days come along we remember the love we have for each other and it helps us get through, again thank you for coming to celebrate with us, god bless".

I quickly got off the stage and made it through the crowd with out a problem. I reached the bar when Alice grabbed my arm.

"Bella why are you wearing black, second why did you let your husband walk off with some chick" Alice questioned.

"What was she supposed to do Alice, make a scene ?" Rosalie asked.

"Yes, Bella you and Edward love each other fight for it" Alice persuaded.

"First off to answer you first question. I wore black cause it seemed appropriate, second i'm not making a scene and embarrassing myself, and third i'm asking for a divorce"

"What!" the said in unison.

"Look I'll call you guys tonight I'm leaving".

I gave my sister and my cousin as i walked to the bathroom. I heard moaning and Edward grunting calling out Tanya's name. I sighed. I walked over to the bathroom stall and knocked on the door.

"Edward, I'm ready to go home".

I heard them grumble and wrestle to get them sleeves together. Next thing I knew a pair of keys were being thrown over the bathroom stall.

"Then go home" he said as he and Tanya continued there previous activities.

I picked up the keys and i drove home. All the while i was thinking "this is it" I'm finally going to leave. I can't keep putting myself through this, I'm only human. Edward and I used to be happy, we used to even be in love. Now we hate each other and I can't keep doing this to myself. If i love myself i need to have the self respect to walk away. Edward has kept me down for too long. It was his dreams i followed, tried to build on. We were always supposed to be together "Till death do us part" but i can't die hating myself for never having the strength to walk away.

I walked into the house, took a shower and began to pack my cloths. This time i was going to do it, i was really going to leave. I wasn't going to pretend anymore. I needed to do this for me, only for me. I grabbed all my belongings and began to load them into my car. I went to the garage and grabbed the boxes that where in there and began to pack my pictures. An hour later and I was almost finished Edward decided he want to make and appearance.

"This again" he mumbled throwing his suit jacket on the couch.

"Nope, I'm leaving for real this time" I said quietly. I don't care if he hears me or not I"m out.

Edward raised an eyebrow "Really act one Bella leaves and packs a bag, act two Bella asks for a divorce , act three Bella comes back home and we do it".

"Look around you Edward, for real this time I'm gone." I said as i loaded the last box into my car.

I walked back inside to see Edward's face twisted with a flurry of emotions. Rage, anger, humiliation, _hurt. Now that one i was shocked not that i cared._

"Where the hell are you going" he yelled.

" I'm leaving" i said.

"What about your vows, till death do us part" he spat.

"What about to love and to honor. You neither love nor honor me Edward you couldn't even wait till we got home" I screamed.

"Your not leaving me" he said .

"Watch me" I spat as i walked out the door.

I don't know what Edward broke but it made a loud boom as it hit the floor "BELLA" He screamed.

I didn't look back i got into my car and drove away. I watched through my review mirror as Edward yelled and screamed for me to come back. I was so happy to finally be away from Edward that I didn't see that the light turned red. The next thing i knew my car was hit and everything faded to black.

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**Chapter Note - **Bella and Edward have been going through problems for 6 years and I know Edward seems heartless but he has his reasons. **LOOK ON MY PROFILE TO SEE THERE DRESS AND OUTFITS**

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**Authors note - **What do you think of my story review and I'll up date. check out my other stories as well

-jazzberry


	2. Waking up

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there life and fix there marriage.

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"Forgiveness is God's invention for coming to terms with a world in which, despite their best intentions, people are unfair to each other and hurt each other deeply. He began by forgiving us. And he invites us all to forgive each other."- Lewis B. Smedes

Chapter song- Evanescence- Exodus

**Since today is my birthday i thought i would give you all a treat**

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Screaming.

Lights.

Arguing.

That's all I remember before it went black again. I awoke slowly, my vision was hazy. I could hear arguing in the room that I was in but, I couldn't see anybody. I thought about how I ended up in the hospital, assuming that's where I am. Edward and I got into an argument, I told him I was leaving, and I got hit by a car. My only thought at the moment was "I hope he isn't here" _Not like he cares if i live or die. _Then the arguing only seemed to louder, then I could tell who it was. Edward, Alice, Rosalie, and my brother in law Emmett where arguing. Why, I had no clue but I laid there pretending I was asleep.

"I want to see her Alice, move" Edward growled. _Wow he's getting angry over me, that hasn't happened since we were engaged._

"Really Edward, I'm shocked, you have sex with your girlfriend at your own anniversary party and now you want to see your wife, please" Alice spat.

"She's still legally married to him Alice, he has a right to see her" Emmett reasoned.

"Well he's not" Rosalie joined in.

"No one asked you" Edward growled.

"Well I'm telling you, your not seeing her" Rosalie spat.

Rosalie and Edward were never the best of friends, in fact they never liked each other. Rosalie set me up on a blind date with a guy named Riley. It was fun, at first. He took me to the movies and we went to dinner. He started to get fresh around the third course and I had to end it. Edward was our waiter at the time and he stepped in. That was when i first met him. Every since then we were inseparable. i invited Edward to a family dinner at my house to meet my mom after 4 months and lets just say it didn't go how I thought it would. By the end of the night Rosalie and Edward hated each other, Alice was covered in pasta, my mom was pissed, and I was crying in my room but, that's family right.

"She asked for a divorce Edward, why are you here?" Alice asked.

"I know" Rosalie said sweetly "Cause he wants to see if she's dead so he can be with his slut".

"Alice, say something" Emmett said.

"What can I say, Rosalie's right" Alice said softly.

"This is bullshit" Edward said vexed "Bella I'll be back".

"Thank god he's leaving, Bella I know you're awake" Rosalie laughed.

"How did you know" I crooked out.

"Cause your eye lids were moving" Alice smiled at me.

"Bella, you're okay" Emmett said leaning on my side of my bed.

I sat up slowly, feeling relatively okay. My sides, and my back were sore but, I was fine. I looked down at myself and my arm was in a cast. _Great my arm is broken again._

"Bella you had us worried" Rosalie said sitting in the seat by my bed.

"Yeah, I felt like I was going to explode" Alice smiled slightly.

"You had me worried little sister" Emmett said pushing my damp hair from my forehead.

"I won't be your little sister anymore, its sad I'm really gonna miss you" I said as tears threatened to spill over.

"Bella you'll always be my little sister even if my jack-ass of a brother is to stupid to see what he has" Emmett smiled.

"Had, past tense" Rosalie muttered.

"Do you have to open your mouth at every occasion?" Emmett asked.

At this Alice and I laughed. Rosalie and Emmett were always at each others throats. I'm surprised they haven't done it already, you can tell that's where this is headed. I smiled in spite of everything that was going on with me. I'm glad that Rosalie likes Emmett, even though she denies it. I'm happy that she's finally finding happiness after all the scum bags she been with over the years.

"Really Emmett, that sophisticated charm of yours just shines right through every time you open up your barbarian " Rosalie smiled.

"If we're going to have an argument try using words I can understand" he smirked as he winked at her.

Rosalie blushed and turned her head. Alice sighed and began talking "Let's get down to business shall we".

"Fine, what is it" I asked.

"Bella we managed to get you an apartment" Alice said.

"Really, thanks I appreciate it" I smiled reaching for her hand.

"I suggested that you live with us but, I know how you like you privacy" Rosalie smirked.

"Wait, how did you guys do that I've only been out for a day" I questioned.

"No you haven't" Emmett said softly.

"What do you mean?" I asked getting aggravated quickly.

"Bella you've been passed out for three weeks" Alice said tenderly.

"THREE WEEKS!" I screeched.

"Yeah you hit your head pretty hard" Rosalie said.

"Does you head hurt" Emmett asked.

"No, not really" I answered truthfully.

"Bella when we found your car all of your stuff was in the trunk. We assumed that you moved out, you did move out didn't you" Alice asked.

"Yeah, I did".

"Good so you don't have to go back to that bastard's house" Rosalie smiled.

"Hey!" Emmett exclaimed.

"Its true, and you know it" Rosalie mouthed to Emmett.

"I know" he answered back.

"So, where is this apartment?" I asked.

"Well its near ours, but its not" Alice said.

"How close is it to your apartment Alice?"

"Four blocks" she smiled cheerfully.

"Great I have my cousin and my annoying sister closer to me than normal" I smiled.

"You'll love it Bella, its a one bed room apartment, we did your room for you i hope you don't mind" Rosalie said.

"No, I don't mind" I smiled.

"Bella, are you and Edward really separating?" Emmett asked.

"Em, how can you ask me that after all the things he's done. You of all people should be on my side, you know what he does" I looked him straight in the eyes, daring him to say he didn't know what Edward did.

"Look I go to go, check on you later Bells" Emmett said getting up and kissing my forehead. Then he left.

"So lets talk about the new apartment" I smiled.

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Its been two weeks since I got out of the hospital. Edward came to visit me twice both times he was turned away by Rosalie and Alice. When I got out of the Hospital; Alice drove me home since Rose had to work. The apartment was beautiful, I loved it. They set up all my stuff that didn't get wrecked in the crash. I still had my t.v, so I was thankful. Alice set up my phone the weekend I got home and I told her to give my number to Esme and Emmett. Emmett called regularly to check up on me, Esme offered to drop by but, I didn't want her to know where I lived in case she tells Edward. Emmett told me that he went to the hospital to look for me and they told him I was gone. _Ha-ha that must have been a shock for him. _I got to thinking one night when I was finally alone. I never finished college and invested all my money and my time in Edward's clinic. I thought about taking some college courses on-line to actually do something with my life besides being "Betty Crocker" at home. _Maybe that's why he cheated on me. _I hated when _THOSE _thoughts came. I was always blaming myself for Edward's mistakes.

Alice came over on Saturday telling me that she wanted to take me to a support group for women who've been through what I have. I didn't want to go to a group with women who felt sorry for themselves and their failed marriages, hell I could stay home and do that by myself. I tried to tell Alice that i didn't want to go but, she said It would be therapeutic for me to cleanse myself of him. _But you really don't want to do you. _I told her I would check it out. We walked into the building and the receptionist directed us to the 5th floor room 17.

"Nervous?" Alice asked.

"A little" I answered "We can always go to the movies" I reasoned.

"No, Bella this is for your own good" she said as the elevator doors opened.

We walked out and into the room, just as the women were grabbing coffee and pastries.

"Hi, Are you Alice and Bella ?" A woman with brown hair came up to us.

"Yes" Alice answered first "I'm Alice and this is my sister Bella" she said as she stuck out her hand to shake the woman's.

"I'm Angela and I created this group, come sit down where about to begin" she smiled.

I found Alice and I a seat, the other women began sitting as well. I assumed they were about to start.

"We have to new member with us today everyone, Alice and Bella" she smiled.

I smiled at them as they all said there hello, and Hi's. I was pretty nervous but, I tried not to show it.

"Do you want to just listen for a bit ladies while we began to get a feel of our group?" Angela asked.

"Yes" we both said as they began.

"Lauren want to start us off" Angela asked.

"Sure" Lauren grumbled. "Well my name is Lauren and I'm 332 years old and I'm a divorced".

"What happened" A woman with brown hair asked.

"Well my husband Tyler worked at an insurance firm, he was never home and I was always with our son. One day he came home and told me about his fascination with some car. I thought he was going through a mid-life crisis, why would he want a car that wasn't safe for our son. One day I came home after dropping our son of at school and saw him with our neighbor"

"What an asshole" Alice said getting angry.

I just felt sorry for her. At least she had some sign it was gonna happen, Edward's cheating was out of the blue. _Or maybe it wasn't he did try to talk to you._

"Go on" Angela encouraged "What did you do".

"I divorce him of course and I let our son see him on weekends, I hate him so much . He's getting married to the girl he cheated on me with, her name is Anna".

"Thank you Lauren, Jane do you want to share next" Angela suggested.

"Yes" she said quietly. "My husband Aro and I have been married for about 14 years. I thought it was originally strange when he started changing the underwear that he normally wears and started lying to me" she smiled with a sad kinda look. "He never wanted to talk to me anymore it was always about him. I was so depressed, I figured if i married an older man he would be more mature but, he wasn't".

"What happened next" Angela pressed.

"Well" she said her voice breaking "He left me, told me he wanted something new and I wasn't it" she cried.

"Its okay Jane that's why where here, Jessica get her a tissue please" Angela said.

Another blonde girl got up and gave the small brown haired girl a tissue. I felt bad for her, it was obvious she was still in love with her husband. I wasn't but, I wanted revenge. I wanted to make him pay for playing with my emotions and messing up my life.

"Bella, would you like to go now" Angela asked.

"Go on" Alice whispered.

"Well I've been married for 6 years, my husband is a doctor and he has a private practice in Forks. Well everything was good or so I thought, for me I say the trouble began when he started working at the clinic. He became so distant, he was never home and our relationship suffered. That's it" I said.

"That's all you want to share" Angela asked.

"Yeah" I said quietly.

After the hour was finished, we all said our good-byes. Alice and I got back into her car and it got me thinking. I have no job to pay for rent or did i finish college, what was i gonna do.

"Alice" I said softly.

"Yeah" she answered, keeping her eyes on the road.

"How am I paying for my apartment, I have no money".

She stopped when we came up to the red light. "Don't worry about that Bella, you just get that divorce".

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**Chapter Note -**Edward came to visit Bella a lot while she was in the hospital but was turned away by Alice ands Rose. Alice is mean to Edward alot now because and only because she had alot of faith in him and truly liked and loved him and thought he was going to take care of her baby-sister but her didn't. Rosalie doesn't like him but you will find out why later. **You will hear from Edward next chapter promise. CHECK OUT THE FLOOR PLANS TO BELLA'S PLACE AND SEE THE PICTURES.**

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**Author's Note- **I thought it was easy to write this chapter will everyone helping bella she doesn't have to face anything yet but she will. I will try to update every other day. I will try not making any promises though.

review and I'll update

-jazzberry


	3. Edward's side part one

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and fix there marriage.

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"When I'm not near I love,

I love the girl I'm near."

- **E.Y Harburg**

Chapter song- Evanescence- Field of Innocence

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**Edward**

6 years of living in my own personal hell. When I first married my wife Isabella Swan I thought I was the luckiest man on earth and at first I was. She thinks our problems first began when I opened my private practice but, no it was way before then. She may find me heartless, but I'm not. At one point in our marriage I had everything. A beautiful home, a wife I knew who loved me, and a good job. Bella became pregnant in the 2ND year of our marriage. I was ecstatic, the thought of becoming as father has aways been a dream of mine but, her pregnancy was having many complications and me being a doctor I knew exactly what was wrong. Bella was 16 weeks pregnant when we lost our son Alexander. My friend and her doctor Felix called it a "late-term miscarriage". We were both devastated. I knew what Bella must be feeling since I have seen many women go through it. Shock, confusion, jealousy, anger, guilt, shame, numbness, depression, frustration and unreality. My initial thought was to be supportive, Bella wasn't the only one who lost a child I did too. Though I never carried him like she did my pain was hers.

**Flashback**

_I heard a loud crash coming from upstairs. I immediately stopped what I was doing and went to go see what it was. Bella was standing in the middle or our bedroom and there was broken glass every. I quickly went over to her and lifted her up and put her on the bed._

_"Bella what happened?" I asked._

_She didn't look at me, it was like she wasn't looking at anything. Her eyes were glazed over and tears were falling down her face. I looked down at her hands and noticed her hands were cut and scraped._

_"Bella, why did you do this" I asked trying to get her to talk. I walked over to the dresser and grabbed a box of tissues and began to clean up her hands._

_"Bella, please talk to me" I tried again._

_Immediately she looked down at me "You want me to talk Edward, what do you want me to say"._

_"Anything I'm here for you, I know-" She cut me off._

_"You know Edward" she spat "What the hell do you know, you didn't feel him, talk to him, buy little outfits, you didn't wake up in the middle of the night and lose our baby so don't tell me you know" she said through clenched teeth._

_"Your right, I'm sorry" I said as I kissed her hands._

_"Just leave me alone Edward, being around you is pissing me of" she said as she got on the bed and went under the covers. A few minutes later she was sleep._

_I sighed and went down stairs to get the dust-pan and the broom. I cleaned up all the glass of the floor and made a note to buy a new mirror for tomorrow. I looked at my wife who was sleeping. She had been like this for two weeks now. I didn't expect her to get better over night but, I thought she would lean on me. All she's done is push me away, I would give her time though because I knew she needed it. Bella would get better and our family would be stronger for it. I went into the nursery that Bella and I had set up for Adam and I cried, for the first time since it happened. I've been bottling it all in. Doing everything I can to help her cope with everything but, I needed this one moment for myself. To come to terms with the fact that I lost my son. Bella told me she felt the baby, she said it was like a fluttering feeling. I wish I would have felt him like she did. Sometimes I feel so guilty, at times I knew I wasn't ready to have a child but, I didn't want to lose him. For the rest of the night I just sat there and cried._

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_Bella still didn't want to talk to me and I needed to go back to work soon if I wanted to open my own clinic. I walked into our bedroom and Bella was no where to be found. I walked around the house, still she was missing. I finally decided to go to the nursery and I seen her sleeping in the rocking chair. I gently put a cover over her and I left for work. As I walked into the hospital my friend Felix bombarded me with questions._

_"Is she doing better" he asked._

_I sighed "No not really she doesn't want to talk to me, I hear her at night though talking to Alice and Rosalie"._

_"That doesn't make sense, why is she talking to them when she could talk to you you're going through the same thing" Felix questioned._

_"I don't know man, but I feel useless right now. She won't eat, barely sleeps, and she cries all the time. When I try and be supportive and comfort her she lashes out at me and pushes me away. She inist the only one who lost a child, I did also but, can I talk to her about no. Felix I'm really at a loss here, I don't know what to do"._

_"Edward you've been doing everything you can, What more can you do?" Felix asked._

_"I don't know but i have to do something"._

_"You know we have a medical convention this week right" He reminded me._

_"Shit, Is there any way I can get out of it" I asked._

_"There is but, If you want to get a loan and have some of these rich people backing you on opening you clinic then you need to come". He said._

_"I can't leave Bella like this, she needs me now more than ever". I explained._

_"She doesn't really need you, you said she's been talking to her sister and her cousin so you can go. Plus half of the time she blocks you out anyway I've seen it so has everyone else. Edward this is your job where talking about she's not working and you need to provide for your family, she barely talks to you as it is maybe you need to get away from her to clear both of your heads for a little bit, you've been getting under each others skins" he reasoned._

_"I guess, let me check in on her then" I said as I walked away and grabbed the nearest phone to call Bella._

_"Hello" God I really hate this voice._

_"Rosalie can I please speak to Bella" I asked._

_"Edward, Bella is in the car where about to leave" she huffed like it was obvious and I should have known they were leaving._

_"Well can you give her a message for me" I asked._

_"Sure,what ever hurry up" she huffed._

_"Fine, tell her that I forgot about a medical convention and I have to leave tonight, tell her that its in Phoenix and I'll be back in 6 days"._

_"Okay, bye Edward" Rosalie said hanging the phone up on me._

_I was getting pissed. Rosalie was always a bitch. At times I think her and Alice were jealous because Bella was younger, married, and used to be happy. I think there always feeding crap into her head about all the things that I don't do for her. I know I'm a good husband and I love my wife._

_"Edward, you want me to drop you off at your house so you can get your stuff"_

_"Yeah, Thanks Felix"._

_Felix and I got to my house quickly since there was little traffic one the road and I got out quickly and rushed into my house and grabbed my cloths and papers from under my bed. I still needed to talk to Bella about setting up an office in the house because this was ridiculous and i needed to get a receptionist._

_"Edward, man are you ready yet!" Felix yelled._

_"Yeah, I am" i said rushing down the stairs with two bags. "I just need to leave a note for Bella"_

**_Bella,_**

**_I completely forgot about the medical convention and I'm going to be gonna for a few days. I love you and we need to talk about the office I found a space in the house that would be perfect. Its gonna take us a day if we drive by car. So call me on cell if you need anything. Love you and I'll call you later tonight._**

**_-Edward_**

_"Lets go man, your wife can call you later" Felix said basically dragging me out of the house._

_*******************************************************************************************************************_

_"Edward after looking over your proposal and your business plan I think I'm going to invest" Royce said as he looked over my plans._

_"Wow' I said speechless._

_"Wow isn't enough your a young doctor with a good head on your shoulders and a have a brilliant idea, we don't have enough private clinics in Forks so I'm glad somebody had the courage to take a chance and do it" he smiled._

_"You won't regret it Royce I promise" I said shaking his hands._

_"I better not" he laughed "Well Edward I'll see you on Monday" He said walking away._

_"Bye" I said as I walked away from him and meet Felix at the bar._

_"So what happened" He slurred._

_"I got the loan and he's backing me up" I smiled. "Bartender, Can I get a Bud Lite" I asked._

_"Sure that's be 5.50"._

_I handed him the money an took a big gulp of my drink._

_'Great now I don't have to work at that shitty hospital anymore" Felix smiled "Cheers" he said lifting his drink._

_"I'm excited, this is like my dream coming true"._

_"Did you tell Bella?" Felix asked._

_"No, I've been calling the house but, I haven't been getting an answer. I'm starting to get worried"._

_"Look man, if she wanted to talk to you she would. I think Bella doesn't want to be bothered with you right now"._

_"Yeah your probably right, but I really should call one more time, at least let her know whats going on"._

_"Edward," Felix sighed "You're a grown man you don't have to tell your wife everything, its not like shes calling you every second telling you every detail about her day"._

_"You right, I'm a grown man, bartender another round for me and my friend". _

_*******************************************************************************************************************_

_After Felix and I left the bar we both headed to our rooms, though he had entertainment to keep him company all I had was my lonely thoughts. I was angry with myself for not being able to protect and care for my family when they needed me but, I was also angry with Bella for pushing me away when I also needed the comfort to know she was there for me but, she turned to Rosalie and Alice. There were times when I really hated them because Bella let them see a part of her that she never let me see. _

_As I was continuing in my musings I didn't even hear my cell ring till I felt it vibrate in my pants._

_"Hello" I groaned out._

_"Edward, baby how are you?"._

_"Fine" I didn't feel like talking. I've been calling non-stop for three days with no answer and when she did pick up the phone it was either Alice or Rosalie telling me Bella was sleeping, or she didn't feel like talking._

_"So" she paused "Did you get the loan?"._

_"I did, Look Bella I need to talk to you about my office"._

_The was a long pause on the other end of the line and I heard quiet sniffling. "Bella I know you don't want to talk about this right now and its not appropriate but, I know a room that's not being used and I-" I never got to finish before Bella was yelling at me._

_"i know EXACTLY what room your talking about Edward and don't worry you'll have your fucking office ready when you come back home" And with that Bella hung up the phone._

_I didn't know why she was getting so mad. Its not like the room was being used. Bella barely decorated the room that in the garage, so her whole little dramatics over the phone had really thrown me for a loop._

_"`Night Bells love you" And with that I feel asleep._

_***********************************************************************************************_

_By Sunday I felt refreshed and ready to go home. I've been at this medical convention for a week now and all I wanted to do was go home to my wife and relax. Since the night I talked to Bella she hasn't called me back and I haven't called her, maybe Felix was right we've both been stressed and have been under each others skins. I think this time away has given me a chance to reflect on allot of stuff. I realized that Bella and I don't have the best communication skills when it comes to each other and I need to fix that._

_"Edward were here" Felix said pulling up in front of my house. I didn't even notcie us get off the highway._

_"Man you didn't even notice did you" He asked chuckling._

_"No I didn't, look I'll call you tomorrow my father said he's found a perfect place for the clinic"._

_"Okay, see ya". Felix smiled driving off._

_I walked to my house and I noticed Rosalie, Alice and Renee coming out. I smiled at them but, they looked at me with this disgusted. Renee finished talking to them and walked over to me._

_"Edward you should really be ashamed of yourself" And she walked away without giving me a chance to respond or ask her what she was talking about._

_Rosalie and Alice walked back in the house. I jogged after them to ask them what was going on._

_"Alice , Rose, what's going on?"._

_"Your a sorry excuse for a man Edward, come on Alice I can't even look at him" Rosalie said grabbing Alice's hand and leaving._

_"Sorry Edward, but Rose is right" Alice said almost quietly so I couldn't hear her._

_I looked at them and turned to look for Bella. "Bella" I called._

_I seen her walking out of the baby's room and she looked at me "I really hope your happy Edward" Bella spat at me._

_I trailed after her and glanced into the baby's room and that's when I saw it. The baby's room was gone. Bella misunderstood me, she thought I wanted this room. I couldn't even grasp that Bella destroyed the room that I created for our child to make an office for me, then get mad at me. I looked around and there was no evidence that this was even a nursery._

_"Bella" I yelled._

_"What Edward, What the hell do you want"._

_"What the fuck did do, how could you" I screamed._

_"Edward what the hell are you talking about" Bella asked._

_"The baby's room, you...you destroyed it"._

_She looked at me as if I was crazy as if I was speaking another language. "Edward we don't have a baby" she said softly. "So we didn't need the room"._

_I couldn't even look at her. I wanted to hit her so bad, how could she act like that, act like our baby never existed. I didn't say anything to her all I did was grab my car keys and left._

**End Flash Back**

As I finished my drink the doorbell rung. I huffed and got up to answer it.

"Who is it?". I asked as I opened the door.

Standing there the one person I could talk to and depend on now more than ever Tanya.

* * *

**Chapter note- **With Edward you will see alot of flash backs from the way he remembers things. As you can see they have allot of problems and there communication skills are horrible. Edward lets his friend Felix influence allot of his decisions and that is a major problem. **Sorry for the mistakes in chapter looking for BETA if anyone is interested. LOOK ON MY PROFILE FOR OUTFITS.**

* * *

**Author's note- **The beginning of the chapter is based on a family member of mine who lost a baby . To any woman who lost one I'm truly so for your lost.


	4. Edward's side part two

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and fix there marriage.

* * *

"The nurse of infidelity  
is sensuality." - **Thomas Carlyle**

Chapter song- Evanescence- Lies

* * *

**Edward**

"Hey, what are you doing here?" I said while I pulled her into a big hug.

"I wanted to check on you, you haven't been to the clinic in three weeks" she said as she kissed my forehead.

"Oh, has it been that long?" I asked walking back to my bar while, she shut the door and took off her coat.

"Yeah it has, Edward you haven't shaved and you look like bathed in a while, what's going on?" she questioned.

"Nothing, I just had a lot on my mind" I told her truthfully. _Your wife left you and now your clueless._

'Felix told me what happened" she said quietly. "Its for the best I think".

"What!?" I almost yelled.

"Look don't get mad okay, I just think now you can be fair to her and be will me after all you never really loved her".

"I never said that Tanya, I love my wife".

She looked at me. "You didn't used the past tense, do you still love her?".

_.............."_I need a drink" I grumbled.

Tanya sighed. "Edward I need your signature on these papers I'll be back for them later, love you".

"You too" I whispered.

Thank god she didn't hear me. I remember the first time that I met Tanya. She was so lively, fun, and energetic. She had aura about her that was just so different from Bella's that it fascinated me.

**Flashback**

_"Edward man, this location is perfect". Felix smiled._

_"I know, its fantastic"._

_"Have you shown Bella yet?" He asked._

_"Are you trying to get me mad right now, you know we haven't been talking for the past month I didn't even tell her I left"._

_"No but, I was wondering have you guys talked?" Felix asked._

_"Not in two weeks, I've tried believe me man but, a person can only do so much till you just give up". I told him honestly._

_"Well Bella's being a bitch lately so don't let that get you down."? Felix joked._

_"Felix man even though I mad at her show some respect okay, she's still my wife"._

_"Sorry" he said hesitantly._

_I sighed and rubbed the bridge of my nose "Just don't let it happen again okay"._

_"Okay, Jesus man bite my head off" he laughed." Obviously some body isn't getting any"._

_"Well obviously" I said annoyed "Bella's been difficult, but its nothing I can't handle"._

_"Well we need furniture and hire some nurses to get us off the ground". He said thoughtfully._

_"So lets get started" I said happily._

_*******************************************************************************************_

_Felix and I sat in the office that Bella made reviewing each women who came in for an appointment._

_"Thank you Marissa, We'll be in touch" I said politely._

_"I hope so" She said seductively as she winked at Felix._

_"If you have any back problems anything you need fixed and I do me anything, don't hesitate to call me" He smiled handing her his business card._

_She walked out of my office with the biggest smile on her face. Flipping her red hair, while Felix laughed._

_"Please man, don't start this crap again" I said annoyed._

_"What!" he said surprised. "I'm being friendly"._

_"Yeah just like you where friendly with our last 4 receptionist" I joked._

_"Well I am a very sexual person, are you mad that your needs aren't being fulfilled these days" he laughed._

_"Keep talking and your pretty little face these women adore isn't gonna be so pretty anymore when I'm through with you"._

_"Really now" He laughed. "Your getting violent on me Eddie"._

_"Just get back to work" I said pushing the next resume' in front of him just as a knock was heard on the door._

_"Uncle Edward your next appointment is here" A happy 10 year old said poking her head through the door._

_"Thank you lily" I smiled._

_"Uncle Felix?" she said hesitantly "Can I have a dollar"._

_"Sure Kid" he said grabbing his wallet. "Knock yourself out"._

_"Thanks Uncle Felix" she said running up to him grabbing the dollar and running out._

_As she was leaving I could hear her telling someone "There right in there miss"._

_"You really love for making your brother's kid work" I said quickly before the woman walked in._

_"My brother's kid needs responsibility and I really didn't feel like watching her, I wanted to help you"._

_The door to my office opened slowly and a tall blonde woman waled in. Initially I thought she was beautiful but, you would have to be blind not to notice that._

_"I here to apply for the receptionist job" she said softly._

_"Have a seat" I told her._

_"Near me" Felix grumbled._

_I shot him a look and continued with my questioning. "So Tanya Denali, why should I hire you?"._

_She looked at me for a minute, her blue eyes seemed so alive that I felt frozen. "Well you should hire me because I'm a hard worker, fast type, I'm very friendly and I can answer phones fast" she laughed._

_"Okay" I said looking at her resume' again " So you went to UNC" ._

_"Yes" she said quickly._

_"What did you major in?" Felix asked._

_"I majored in business management. I would like to own my own business on day if that's possible, and this helps pay the bills"._

_"Okay good, It seems like everything is in order. We'll give you a ca;; when we've made our decision". I smiled._

_"Okay thank you" She said getting up._

_Felix rushed out his seat and caught her hands in his "Thank you Tanya, I hope we meet again some day"._

_She laughed "I hope so too"._

_After Tanya left we interviewed 6 more people. Felix and I were both mentally drained, we just wanted to pick someone and call it a day._

_"I think I liked Madison, she was really hyper" I said shaking my head remembering her interview._

_"No" Felix said quickly "The girl will most likely get on my nerves and I'll fire her, plus she's only 19"._

_"All the more reason to hire her" I laughed. "Most likely she has a boyfriend._

_"" he said angrily "How about Tanya?". he suggested._

_"Yeah, she was interesting" I said thoughtfully._

_"And pretty tempting" Felix smiled. "God man, did you see her in that dress?" he asked._

_I laughed "I'm married man"._

_"That's never stopped me, just because I said I do doesn't mean I won't dip out every now and then. Don't get me wrong Edward I love my wife, but I need variety in my life"._

_"I don't understand you Felix, Olivia is a great woman" I said annoyed that he could cheat._

_'I love Livia and I can't wait till she has our child but, as I said Edward I'm a man who needs variety in there life and right now she's just not cutting it" he said leaning back in the chair._

_"Yeah" I sighed. I leaned back and closed my eyes. For some strange reason I couldn't explain my mind drifted towards Tanya Denali._

_********************************************************************************************_

_Tanya had been working for us for almost a year. We also hired Madison to work as a back up receptionist. Surprisingly she was very serious about her job, Felix and her got along perfectly. I found myself throughout the work day talking more to Tanya than I did to Bella. I would talk to Tanya about my fears, the things I planned to accomplish, Bella, my family, and my child that I Bella and I things only continued to get worse. The last year for us was spent walking out the room when one of us entered it or me sleeping on the couch. It hurt that I couldn't confide in her like I used too but, I was slowly beginning to accept that this was the reality of my marriage. With the clinic taking up most of my time and Bella slowly getting back to herself trying to play the perfect house wife again, I found I really didn't care about that stuff anymore. Bella and I used to be perfect for each other, we used to be on the same page but, now it seems like where on different wave links._

_"Edward..Edward ..you in there?" Snapping figures popped up in front of my face._

_"What?" I said shocked that I blanked for a minute._

_"Are you going to the holiday ball tonight?" Tanya said leaning on the desk in front of me "Come on Edward, I know you like to stay home and be depressed but, tonight is all about having fun"._

_"I don't know" I said hesitantly. I didn't want to ask Bella and have her tell me no, but I didn't want to really ask her in the first place._

_"Edward, I know that look" Tanya sighed._

_"What look" I said surprised._

_"Your thinking about Bella aren't you?". she questioned._

_"Yeah, I am". I said truthfully._

_'Ask her, she'll say yes. If I was her I would say yes"._

_"Thanks Tanya but, I'll think I leave this up to Felix". I smiled._

_'No you won't" Felix said popping up around the corner, clip board in hand "I'm not talking to the old dogs tonight, that's your job. I already have you suit ready so no need to thank me Edward"._

_"Joy" I said angrily "Thanks Felix"._

_**********************************************************************_

_After I left the clinic I went home and found Bella cooking dinner. I almost felt like smiling seeing her with flour all over her face, and singing songs but, I didn't. I didn't say anything I just walked into my office and plopped on couch. A few minutes later a soft knock was heard at my office door._

_"Yes" I said still laying on the couch._

_"Edward" Bella said walking in quietly. " I don't know what's going on with us but, I don't like it" she whispered moving next to me._

_I wanted to tell her I didn't like it either, that I just wanted things to go back to normal before we lost track of each other and everything we stood for but, I didn't I said nothing._

_"Edward I love you so much and I know before was a difficult time for me but, that's no reason-" I cut her off._

_"Bella please not now, I'm tired and I don't really feel like dwelling on your emotional issues for one night". _

_She looked at me with sadness, disappointment, and remorse in her eyes. Bella didn't say anything else she got up and left._

_I wanted to tell her I was sorry but, the words didn't come out of my mouth and I didn't feel like even trying, I closed my eyes and let the silence of my house fill my mind while I drifted of to sleep._

_I woke up two hours later by a soft tapping on my shoulder, I opened my eyes to see two large brown ones staring down at me._

_"Edward, you have to get ready for the part were going to be late" Bella smiled slightly._

_"Like I told Felix, I'm not going". I grumbled wanting to go back to my peaceful sleep._

_"Edward, this is work not a social call get up"._

_"Fine Bella" I huffed as she pulled my hand._

_*************************************************************************************_

_After I finished showering and put on my suit I noticed Bella was nowhere to be found. I was puzzled so I quickly put on my shoes and walked around calling her name._

_"Bella, where are you?" I said softly._

_"I'm right here" she said walking of from the kitchen._

_I was literally floored when I saw her. She was in a baby blue ball gown, her hair was curly in an up-do. She looked so amazing that I wanted to cry._

_"What!" she said suddenly worried "Is there something on my face"._

_"No" I said walking up to her and grabbing her hands "You look beautiful and I would be honored if you would accompany me tonight"._

_Bella laughed and then kissed me on the lips softly "Why would I get dressed up like this if I wasn't going out with you, Are you ready"._

_"Yes I am, but wait a minute I want to give you something". I said pulling a velvet box from my suit pocket._

_"Edward, what is it?" Bella questioned._

_"Something that will go perfect with that dress" I said opening the box and showing her the diamond necklace._

_Bella gasped. "Edward, its beautiful"._

_"Turn around". I said as I lifted the necklace from the box and put it on her._

_"Are things going to get better for us Edward?" Bella asked._

_That was a question I really didn't know the answer to._

_************************************************************************************_

_Bella and I arrived around 9:30, the place was beautiful. I saw Felix and his wife Olivia stand by the bar looking like they where having an argument so I direct Bella over to a table. I didn't even notice Tanya sitting at the table when I escorted Bella there. She was in a pretty red dress, and her blonde hair was curled._

_"Hello Tanya, I would like you to me my wife Isabella"._

_The look that passed between these two women where looks of disgust, anger, irritation, exasperation, and envy._

_"So Bella" Tanya said sarcastically "How's married life"._

_Bella looked at me "You told her"._

_"I was angry, I didn't mean to"._

_"You know what it doesn't even matter" Bella said brushing it off, only to get me angry._

_I hated when she didn't want to talk about thing and close herself off to me. That was the reason why we were in this situation that we are in now._

_"Do you want to dance?" I asked Bella._

_"No" she said curtly. "I don't, I'm going to get something to drink"._

_"I can get it" I offered._

_"No" she said sharply "I can do it, If you'll excuse me" she said looking at me then Tanya._

_As Bella walked away Tanya scoffed._

_"Why were you so rude to my wife?" I asked annoyed with her behavior._

_"Because after all that she's put you through you guys show up here like your the perfect people in love" she said. _

_"She's my wife" I said matching her anger "We make up and we argue at the end of the day it's us against the world"._

_Tanya scoffed again, rising up from the table. "If you don't see that I'm the better woman in all this then I don't know what your thinking"._

_With that Tanya walked away leaving me stunned and shocked at her revelation._

_*******************************************************************************************_

I jumped back to the present and I realized that I made so many mistakes with Bella and being with Tanya didn't help the situation. I also came to the realization that I want my wife back.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Sorry it took so long to update **LOOK ON MY PROFILE FOR OUTFITS. SORRY FOR ANY MISTAKES IN THIS CHAPTER LOOKING FOR A BETA IF ANYONE IS INTERESTED.**

*************TO ANYONE WHO READS MY STORY "LET ME HEAR YOU SCREAM" I HAVE GOOD NEWS AND BAD NEWS. THE GOOD NEWS IS I FINISHED THE CHAPTER AND ITS THE LONGEST ONE I EVER WROTE AND I'M EXCITED BUT THE BAD NEWS IS MY BETA IS REALLY BUSY SO IT COULD TAKE A MONTH FOR THE CHAPTER TO BE EDITED OR LONGER BUT PLEASE WHEN ITS FINISHED CONTINUE READING IT*********************

**-JAZZBERRY**


	5. Date night suprises

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and fix there marriage.

* * *

" A woman's desire for revenge  
outlasts all her other emotions"** - Cyril Connolly**

Chapter song- Anya Maria- Satellite Heart

**Thanks to my beta robbsweetangel your amazing**

* * *

The realization that you are alone doesn't actually hit you till you hear the silence in your own heart. Edward and I haven't spoken since the night that I left him. I know its the right thing for me, to have a fresh, clean start but, I miss him. I was interrupted from my thoughts when my door bell rang. I hopped from my couch and zoomed to the front door.

"Alice, what a big surprise" I said annoyed.

Alice made it her little mission these past few weeks to get me out and about to experience the life of a newly single woman, beside group meetings I've been home in bed, crying. Not because I'm upset at my decision but, I'm really upset at myself. I have no job, no security, and no family of my own. Everything that I wanted was torn from me by one woman. Tanya. I should really hate her but, I don't she didn't cause my problems, I did and now I have to deal with it.

"Bella, Bella snap out of it its like your in a daze" Alice said cheerfully.

"I feel like I am" I said quietly to myself.

"What was that?" Alice questioned.

"Nothing, nothing at all." I smiled. It wasn't a happy smile it was really pathetic.

"You know what Bella, I'm going to set you up on a date" she smiled happily.

"No" I screeched "I'm not ready".

"Of course you are, your a young beautiful woman who needs pleasu-".

"Alice!" I yelled. "Stop, I get you want to help but, its to soon. For god sake its only been three weeks, you need to stop worrying about my life and worry about your own. Your not getting any younger".

Alice looked at me with a pained expression on her face, it was a mixture of depression, hurt, and anger. I knew I was wrong and she didn't deserve that.

"Alice" I said softly looking into her dark brown eyes "I'm sor-".

Before I could finish my sentence Alice cut me off " You know what Bella save it, I know I'm not getting any younger" she said angrily. "Do you realize that You, Rosalie and Mom are all that I have left, You know why I'm pushing you and Rose to go out and find a guy so you could live the "American dream" dream with". she said throwing up her hands in frustration. "Cause I can't have kids Bella, I have Premature ovarian failure".

I was still stuck on the "can't have kids part", that's all Alice ever talked about since we were younger, she always wanted to be a mother and was always good with kids, so the idea of her not having any kinda had me at a stand still. I remember back in high Alice had this boyfriend Rich, whom she had sex with constantly trying to get pregnant, when my mom found out; lets just say that wasn't Alice's finest hour.

"Alice you can't have any kids" I repeated.

"I don't know" she said blinking back tears "Between 5 and 10 percent of women with POF may spontaneously become pregnant, so their may be a chance for me or I could try In-Virto, my doctor said that could work".

"Alice sweetie, You can't live your life through me you'll be misreable, hell I"m miserable. Alice take me as an example, never live for someone else till you find yourself first". I smiled.

"Bella, I know you need time to grieve over _Him _but, please just go on one date, for me" she said batting her eyes, making them twinkle.

"Fine Alice one date, If I like the guy then I'll see him again if I don't no more dates, I'm not ready".

"That's fine" she squealed " Bella this will be so exciting".

"But remember what I said Alice" I said calmly.

Alice walked out of my apartment with the biggest smile on her face as she was leaving I swear I could have heard her say "Your going to love him".

I locked the door after she left, I sighed. _Are you really ready to date Bella?_

I didn't know if I really was ready but, I was sure as hell not going sit around while Edward was off living the good life with Tanya.

* * *

Its been a pretty eventful three weeks for me. I started taking on-line college classes to get my degree in Business Management. Alice and I have been looking at places where I can open my restaurant. Since cooking is the only other thing that I'm good at it seemed like the my best option for money. A couple of days ago I filed for divorce and It was the most liberating feeling ever. I felt trapped for so many years but, now its like I'm finding myself all over again and I was loving ever moment of it.

Alice came over yesterday to get me ready for my date on Saturday. She took me to the spa, where she proceed to get me a Brazilian wax, the pain was intense. Then she took me to the beauty salon and the nail shop. I was finally feeling like a woman, a beautiful woman.

"I'm nervous Alice" I said when we went shopping for an outfit.

"I know, but change is good for you" she smiled.

Alice and I spent the entire day looking for an outfit that she would aprove of, we finally came across this beautiful blue dress that I fell in love with.

"Bella you're gonna look fabulous" Alice squealed. "He's going to love you".

"Alice I don't even know his name?" I said.

"Don't worry I will give you the card on Saturday".

"Uhh" I said annoyed. "Alice I don't know why I agreed to this".

"I know three reasons" she smirked "One because you love me, two because change is good, and three because you love doing you sister favors".

I looked at her dumbfounded. "Alice here is the three problems with you logic; One I love you to an extent, two change isn't always good, and three your the only sister that I have".

She stared at me and the bust out laughing " I promise Bella you're are going to love him".

I gave her a half smile but, then a thought occurred to me _How did Alice meet this man._ "Alice how did you meet this man?" I questioned.

She stopped shuffling through the cloths and looked at me with a guilty expression on her face.

"Alice" I said sternly.

"Bella I'm sorry but, Rosalie told me about him and I'm just passing info on to you".

"What!" I almost yelled. "You don't even know what he looks like".

"No" she said in a mousy like voice " I don't but, Rosie does from what she tells me he's gorgeous".

"Alice this man could be a serial killer".

"Rosalie would never put you in a bad situation" she said defending our cousin.

"Really, what about the time when we went to that bar in New York and she hopped on this bikers bike and left me and you with these weird looking dudes. Turns out the guy who hit on me was a pedephial. They were looking for him on the news."

"Bella that only happened once and she's apologized 100 times by now".

"Still" I said "It chances nothing I'm not going".

"Fine" Alice huffed "Sit at home and be grumpy, while your all ' Whoa is me, Edward is having the time of his life with Tanya'.

I stopped and stared at Alice. Never before had I wanted to hit a person more in my life then I did her at that moment. I took in a calming breathe and I relax.

"I'm sorry Bella" Alice said quietly.

"Never mind, If Edward can date so can I right, I mean it has been a couple of months". I smiled slightly.

"Right" Alice brightened visibly. "This man isn't going to know what hit him".

Saturday finally came around and I had to admit to myself that I was pretty excited at the idea of going on a date after three long years of nothing. Alice and Rosalie came over to help me get ready. Alice gave me his card and his name was Jasper Whitlock. Rosalie had everything set up for me. He was going to come at 8:00, he knew my name, age, address. All that I had to do was play the waiting game. Alice decided to lighten up the mood by pouring us all a glass of red wine. I felt my stress and nervousness float away with each sip of the wine that I took. Before I knew it it was 8:00 and my door bell rang.

"You nervous Bella" Rosalie asked flinging her blonde hair back.

"Not really" I smiled then giggled. "I feel like this is right".

"That's my girl" Alice smiled giving me a hug. "I really hope you have fun tonight.

The doorbell rang again and I walked to the front door to open it. When I did my breathe got caught in my throat. I had to mentally remind myself to breathe. In front on me looked like a man who could be on the cover of any fashion magazine. With his curly blonde hair and boyish looks and slim body he was literally a god.

"Hello you must be Bella Swan" he smiled his southern accent shining through.

I nodded my head and finally found my voice after a moment "Yes I''m Bella please come in" I smiled.

I showed him inside and introduced him to everyone. "You already know my cousin Rosalie" I said pointing to Rose.

He smiled at her "Nice to see you again Rosalie".

"Same here Jasper". she said in a friendly voice which was so unlike her.

"And this bundle of fire is my sister Alice".

When I looked at Alice she was speechless staring at Jasper, her mouth was open and she had a twinkle in her eye. She began to blush and smile after she composed herself.

Jasper had the same expression on his face as well "Hi I'm Jasper Whitlock" he said walking up to her with his hand extended.

"Alice" she smiled and took his extended, as she grabbed his hand I don't know what happened but, she gasped and snatched her hand away clutching in to her chest.

Jasper stared at his hand for a moment before turning to me and asking me if I was ready to go. I quickly got my jacket and purse and said goodbye to them as I left, Jasper did the same except he didn't say a word to Alice and she didn't say anything to him as well.

As Jasper helped me into his car, we fell into a easy and light conversation.

"So Jasper what do you do?" I asked.

"Well I used to work in New york where I was a doctor there but, I got transferred here to this new clinic that opened up in Forks".

"That's nice" I smiled.

"What do you do?" he asked.

"Well right now I'm taking college classes online for business management and I'm about to open a resturant". I smiled slightly.

"What kind of resturant?"

"Umm I was thinking about an italian resturant because we don't even have on out here, I believe it would make a killing".

"I think so too" he smiled brightly.

I looked at Jasper and smiled. All of a sudden a quick look crossed his face and he swore silently.

"Bella I completely forgot that I have dinner that I have to go at the clinic, there inviting all there new employees, Would you like to come" he said ruefully.

I simply smiled and said yes. _Clinic, wait didn't Edward just open a clinic the only one in Forks. He works with EDWARD. OH SHIT._

Before I had time to back out and say I wanted to go home we were already there. Jasper, like the perfect gentleman helped me out of the car. As we walked inside I realized that I never did see what Edward's clinic looked like but, it made me smile. _He used my interior designs._

"It truly is beautiful" Jasper said quietly beside me.

"It is" I replied. I couldn't keep my mind from running wild. Edward and Jasper worked together. "So you must know Edward Cullen" I said lightly.

"Yes I do, Edward is my boss. Do you know him?" he asked casually.

"You can say that" I calmly.

"Bella why don't I find us a table and get us something to drink".

"Okay" I said cheerfully.

As Jasper worked our way through the large crowd of people to sit us at a table in the front I saw Edward. My breathe stopped, as did my heart. All I could think about was all the rotten things he had done to me but, the again I couldn't put all the blame on him, at times I wasn't a good wife.

"Bella what would you like to drink?" Jasper asked.

"Rum and Coke" I said.

"You got it" He said as he walked away from me.

I watched as Edward walked on the stage in his suit, I looked at his face and it seemed like he had purplish bursies under his eyes like he hadn't slept in weeks. I felt bad for him I truly did.

Jasper came back with my drink and he had a beer in his hand.

"Sorry if this is making you uncomfortable, I didn't know" he said suddenly out of the blue.

"Didn't know what" I looked at him but, I knew he already found out.

"That Edward is your husband well ex-husband".

"It's no problem Jasper" I told him honestly. "I mean we live in a small town I was going to have to see him eventually".

"Yes but, to put you into a situation that was both uncomfortable and could have been prevented, for that I'm truly sorry".

"Jasper please stop apologizing" I laughed, touching his arm "You couldn't have possibly known, let's just enjoy the rest of our evening".

"Let's start over he smiled brightly. "Hi I'm Jasper Whitlock a complete ass".

I laughed "Hi I'm Bella Swan soon to be ex-wife of your boss".

As we talked Edward began to speak.

"Thank you everyone for coming this evening. To everyone who has been dedicated and put in there hard work this evening is to you" he said rasing his class, while the room erupted in appluase.

"The clinic will be opening in two weeks and I am so pleased and honored to be working with the best doctors in there respected feilds, live it up cause in the next week we are going to be in hell".

Everyone laughed as Edward left the stage, it all happened so quickly that I didn't even notice. Someone called Edward's name and he turned his head and his eyes caught mine as Jasper was asking me if I wanted to dance.

I seen the emotions flash through his eyes. Confusion, anger, jealousy, all of it was there.

"Edward you have to talk to me" Tanya said running up to him jumping in my line of view.

"Tanya enough I already told you we are through". He said moving swiftly out of the way walking towards me.

"Edward" I whispered.

"Why, Edward please!" she screamed drawing the attention of everyone in the room.

"Leave Tanya" he said sternly.

As Edward was about to approch me Tanya screamed again "I'm pregnat Edward and its your baby".


	6. Late night visitors

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and fix there marriage.

* * *

"Cheating was easy,  
but impossible to go back to." - **Dean Osborne**

Chapter song- Requiem of spirit-(remix)- Zelda

**Thanks to my beta robbsweetangel your amazing**

* * *

_"I'm pregnant Edward and it's your baby"._

Those word rang through my ears as Jasper drove me home that night.

_"I'm pregnant Edward and it's your baby"_

_"I'm pregnant.."_

_"Edward and..."_

_"It's your baby"._

_"Your Baby"_

_"Your baby"._

_"Baby"_

_"Baby"_

"Bella" Jasper said as he pulled up in front of my building "Are you okay".

It seemed like I was in a trance. I saw myself saying I'm okay, saw myself telling him I had a good time, saw myself saying I wouldn't mind going on another date with him, saw myself kiss him goodnight on the cheek as I walked up the stairs to my apartment. All I could think about was what Tanya had just said, "_I'm pregnant Edward and it's your baby"._To say I wasn't hurt would be the understatement of the year. Never would I have thought that Edward would have been stupid enough to get that _woman _pregnant while we are still married.

_Your divorced Bella, the rules no longer apply._

_Its not like he ever cared._

_Maybe he did care and I was to stupid to see._

_Stupid, you got yourself out of a bad situation. He was bad._

_I'm so hurt right now, I can't breathe._

_Yes you can Bella, be strong._

My head and my heart were clashing and I was powerless to stop it. I didn't want to believe that Tanya was pregnant, that Edward was getting his happy family, and I wasn't included. Something we have fought for for six years came crashing down by one woman. I truly hated Tanya. I never got a chance to get angry or go through the emotions your supposed to feel after a divorce or going through divorce, I was a robot. Going through the motions just to make it through the day not realizing that I was truly hurting inside until now. For the first time I cried. I cried for my lost baby, cried for my failings as a wife, cried for my broken marriage, and I cried even harder for Edward.

* * *

Two weeks have past since the "_Incident" _as I now call it and Jasper has been laughing it off as if was nothing and it made it easy to break into a new relationship with him. I introduced him to my family but, Alice failed to make an appearance. She always seemed so strange around Jasper as if she was uncomfortable when she did come around, him too but, I paid it no mind. I was starting to finally feel better about the whole Tanya and Edward fiasco, until I saw him at the supermarket. It was the first time I actually saw him without the protection of anyone to back me up or stand behind me, to say I wasn't scared to death would be a lie, I was terrified.

"Hey Bella, I haven't seen you in a while" He smiled though it didn't reach his eyes.

"I've been really busy, I'm busy now Edward I have to go". I said quickly as I pushed my cart away.

"Wait!" he said suddenly as his hand shot out, effectively stopping me and my shopping cart in the process. " I need to talk to you".

"About what?" I said angrily.

"You know what" he snapped.

I cringed. Edward always scared me when he was angry, for a usually calm person he had a way of taking his anger out on you that was never pretty.

"Edward" I said calmly "If you are referring to the situation that happen two weeks ago that is none of my business, whatever goes on between you and Tanya is between you and Tanya. You don't have to answer to me remember I'm not your wife anymore".

He actually looked hurt by my words as if he was shocked that I would say something like that.

"I know Bella but, I feel you deserve an explanation" he sighed. "Look if you thinking Tanya getting pregnant was like some sick sort of revenge against you it's not like that".

"I never thought that" I told him .

"Good, Tanya and I have been broken up for about a month and two weeks now" he said quickly.

"Do you want some kind of an award for telling me this Edward I don't care" I snapped at him.

_This asshole is really trying to hurt me._

_Yeah tell me more lies Edward, I love them._

_If I could shoot you and not get caught I really would._

"Bella enough with the sarcasm it doesn't suit you" he snapped back at me. "I'm telling you this because I never dreamed in a million years that Tanya would be pregnant."

"Is it yours" I said in a monotone voice.

"Yes, it is" he said just as plainly.

"Why did she do it at the clinic's business party?" I asked curious to see what his answer would be.

"Because I haven't spoken to her in a month and two weeks" he laughed, though it was a harsh laugh.

"Are you.....are you happy that you gonna be a father now?" I asked my voice cracking as tears threatened to overcome me.

"Yes and no" he said seriously.

"What do you mean?" I said confused by his answer.

"I'm happy I'm going to be a dad because I love kids, I treat them everyday but, it should have been you Bella. You should have been the mother of my child" he said softly, almost quietly.

"Don't " I said as tears ran down my face "Don't say anything more Edward I'm done".

As I tried to walk away Edward grabbed my hand stopping me again.

"Bella these past few weeks have been a nightmare for me. I wake up in bed we shared for six years alone and my one thought at the end of the day is 'Where is Bella'?, but your never there. I know I've made mistakes and cheating is the biggest thing I could have done that finally but the nail in the coffin, it is unforgivable but, I don't want you to forgive me, I want to explain something" he said calmly. "If I let go of your hand do you promise not to walk away?" he asked, his green eyes so trusting of me .

"I promise Edward" I smiled slightly.

"When we where married I never came to you and you never came to me. Out off all our problems the only people who you would talk to were Rosalie and Alice. I'm your husband I should have been the first one you confided in, not them". He sighed running his hands though his messy hair " It felt like a competition between all of us and I couldn't take it so I didn't. Bella,Tanya was there when I need her, she took your place. She gave me something that you never gave me , or at least I never saw it she gave me support, love and friendship".

"Edward I gave that to you" I said trying to defend myself.

"When?" he asked softly.

I tried to think of when I gave him the support he needed but, nothing would come to mind. I was getting angry, why should I be the one to blame, he cheated not me, he broke up our home, not me, he should be the one hurting right now, not me.

"Edward don't try to twist this around, what you did is unforgivable. I may get your reasoning now but, that doesn't change the fact that you cheated, Look I really have to go" I said slowly. "Good bye Edward".

I started to walk away, this time he didn't try to stop me. I felt tears running down my face. It's funny how only Edward could make me go through all these emotions and make me feel human again when others couldn't.

"I love you Bella, I always will" I heard Edward say behind me.

I stopped, I just couldn't do this to myself again. Did he know the complications of that word, what it could do to people, to me especially. I couldn't do it to myself, I wouldn't turn around.

_Don't turn around Bella._

_Don't...._

_Don't........_

_Turn......._

_Around....._

"Edward" I said as I turned around but, he was gone.

_Good riddance, my brain said._

_Come back, my heart screamed._

By the time I left the supermarket, my make-up was smudged, my face had tear stains and I had a splintering headache that just wouldn't go away. I made a promise to my self when I got back into the car, I'm never going to that supermarket again.

* * *

When I got home I quickly put away my groceries and plopped onto my couch and turned on my t.v. , nothing was on as usual but, it gave solace to hear some sound in this empty apartment that I call my home. The phone rang and I saw the number, it was Rosalie but, I didn't feel like talking so I screened the call. She would leave a message like she always did and I would call her back later.

_Hey you reached Bella I'm not in at the moment but, please leave your name and your number and I will return your call as soon as possible._

_"Bella it's Rosie, when you get this message call me back. I have to talk to you about Alice "._

Whatever it was it could wait, my family had this annoying way of turning something so small into something huge and it was beginning to piss me off. I didn't know what to do with myself so I decided to go bed.

I climbed into my bed quickly and got under the covers, sleep was coming to me quickly but, my mind would turn off, it was in over drive. I threw back the cover frustrated that I couldn't go to sleep.I looked at the clock on my t.v. and it read 3:45. I sighed to myself and closed my eyes and began to hum " La vie en rose" before I knew it I was knocked out.

I awoke to a loud banging on my door, it was 6:33. I didn't know I was asleep that long but, I guess I was really tired. The banging kept on getting louder and louder and I was shocked cause no one knew where I lived except Alice and Rose and they both had keys so I wondered who could it be.

"Coming" I called out.

I quickly walked to the bath room and through water on my face and brushed my curly messy of hair. The banging was getting louder.

"Coming" I quickly ran to the front door and when I opened it I was in shock, all the blood drained from my face and my body turned stiff.

"Hello Isabella" she said softly "Can I come in?".

"Are you kidding me, get the hell off my door step".

I began to close the door when she jammed her foot in the door way. I was seething inside I wished she would just leave.

"What do you want Tanya?" I asked , my voice not showing any emotion.

"To talk" she said throwing up her tiny hands. She looked so defenseless, her blond hair flowing down her face.

I had to admit she was a beautiful woman, even if I wasn't enough for Edward she was.

"Come in Tanya" I said opening my door.

She walked in her black polka dot dress flowing behind her. I could defiantly see the baby bump.

"Would you like something to drink?" I asked walking into my kitchen and opening a bottle of wine. I was going to need alcohol to get through this talk.

"Fruit punch if you had it" she said taking a seat on the couch.

"Ice?" I questioned.

"No" she said softly.

I walked back to the living room with two glasses and my wine bottle. She seemed to be talking to herself but, as soon as I came she stopped and took a deep breathe.

"Here you go Tanya, do you want to start or should I?" I asked her again my voice showing no emotions on how I really felt.

"You can start" she said taking the cup and drinking most of it down.

"How did you find out where I live?" I asked.

"I asked around" she said.

"Felix told you didn't he?" I asked.

"Yes, he did" .

"So what is it you want Tanya" I said trying to get to the point of this conversation.

"I wanted to talk to you about Edward and the baby" she said sternly, as if she set her mind to something.

"Tanya this has nothing to do with me, As I told Edward earlier what ever goes on between you and him is between you and him it has nothing to do with me".

"Actually it does, see I know Edward is sorry about cheating on you but, I'm not cause frankly I don't care. The way I see it is I met the most wonderful man alive because of you. So basically I've come here to thank you. Secondly stay away from Edward cause once were married I don't want you in my life at all"

I looked at this girl, how dare she try to insult me in my own house. _BITCH _"Look Tanya I've had enough of this garbage coming out of your mouth, now kindly leave".

"And third Bella" she said getting off my couch and walking to the front door. "My wedding is going to be better than yours, he's marrying a college graduate, not some loser. He is going to be proud to introduce me to his friends and business partners not embarrassed because his wife is having some bitch fit because shes UN-happy about the food." she smiled cruelly.

"Do you really think he's going to marry you after he got what he wanted from you. No matter my mistakes, or my faults you can never be me or replace me in his heart, cause I'm always going to be their even if were not together".

"He's going to marry me because he isn't going to want his first born child to be a bastard, that's right Bella I'm giving him his first born child after six years of marriage, all the difficulties of trying to have a kid and finally having one just to lost it, pity."

She opened the door and stepped out just to step back in "And it wasn't him Bella as you often liked to blame him, he told me you know, I guess it really was you. Have a good night Swan" she said closing the door .

I couldn't tell you how long I stared at the door after she left. I felt numb, empty, and destroyed. Tanya destroyed the little bit of hope that I had for myself. Hearing someone else call out all my flaws just made me feel like dying. I wouldn't cry again.

_Lesson learned Bella._

I changed my cloths into my night gown and dusted off the rest of the wine. I took two aspirins and went to sleep quickly, tomorrow is the day when I cleansing everything out of my life

* * *

**CRAZY HOW TANYA JUST RANDOMLY SHOWED UP RIGHT. WHAT WILL BELLA DO REVIEW AND I'LL UPDATE**

**QUESTIONS PEOPLE HAVE ASKED AND I'M ANSWERING.**

**1. THE STORY HAS ALLOT OF TIME JUST AND FLASH BACKS WHEN YOU SEE THE DASH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STORY THATS A TIME JUMP AND ITALICS THATS A FLASH BACK. SORRY IF PEOPLE GET CONFUSED THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS ^_^ **

**2. TANYA WILL BE KEEPING HER BABY AND NO THE CHILD WILL NOT DIE AND YES THE BABY REALLY IS EDWARD.**

**3 AS FOR JASPER AND ALICE YOU WILL SEE**


	7. Brand new day

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and fix there marriage.

"If hes dumb enough to walk away, be smart enough to let him go." - Unknown

Chapter Song- Robert Miles Tell Me A Fable

* * *

Waking up this morning was like being born again for me, I forgot all about my hurt with Edward, all about the pain he has caused me and just smiled for the first time in a really long time. I streached my limbs and laughed, actually I would call it a giggle but, the point was that I felt free, alive, done. The realization that I finally can get on with my life and finally live for me and give up the tears and the stresses of yesterday, was refreshing. I got out of bed and quickly headed for the shower I let the water run till the steam fogged up my entire bathroom. Stepping into the shower I allowed the hot water to fall on me sending a cooling feeling down my back. I poured the strawberry shampoo into my hair and thought to myself that though I would forever miss my baby that I lost and I know that in my heart they would want me to be happy, so thats my mission to be happy. After getting out of the shower and getting dressed I heaeded to my living room and start my job search. As a single woman soon to be a divorcee I had to become independent having other people do things for me was not helping my situation at all. Void of all emotions of my troubled marraige and eagerly embracing the possiblitiy of a new relationship with a new a man I looked for jobs in my local area. A few listings caught my eye, wether they were right for me was not the question how well they paid was the real answer.

DOG GROOMER - FULL TIME/ PART TIME POSITIONS AVAILABLE

LOOKING FOR GOOD EMPLOYEES WHO MUST LOVE PETS. WILLING TO WORK NIGHTS AND WEEKENDS. FLEXIBLE HOURS.

PLEASE CALL SENNA AT 631-867-5309

"This could be fun?" I said out loud to myself ._ Do I really need a cute sad puppy staring at me YES._

I looked at more listings in my paper "Hmm baker, that sound interesting." Looking at that listing had me thinking about the first time I could for Edward after we were we married. I wasn't a good cook to begin with but he just smiled and told me it was the best meal he ever ate. A couple of hours later he was sitting on the toilet repainting the bowl but, I was still proud that he ate it.

_"Edward sweetie I made dinner" I said placing the chicken on the table. I looked at him and he had a shocked look on his face that almost made me laugh. "What I can cook?"._

_"Are you sure" He laughed as he kissed me on the cheek. "I be right back babe I wanna hop in the shower really quickly and change my cloths" He said putting his arms around me and his face in my neck._

_"No , take your time dinner won't be ready for a few minutes. So go get comfortable" I smiled, turning around and kissing him full on the lips. He always made me feel so loved and cherished that I wanted to do something nice for him because the amount of money we spent on take out was starting to take its toll. As a newlywed couple it was my duty to keep my husband happy and __healthy. I checked on the rice and vegetables I looked they were both ready so I put them out for him to enjoy. Edward came down in just some sweat pants and it was hard for me to take my eyes away from his sculpted chest, god he truly was an amazing man._

_"Everything looks good babe" He said taking his seat at the other end of the table. " When did you learn how to cook?."_

_"Well Esme gave me a couple of recipes that has been based down through your family for generations so I thought that I might try my hand at it". I smiled as I sat down and began passing out the food._

_"Its not that easy babe" He smiled as he passed me the vegetables._

_" I know but, it can't be that hard right" I began to say as Edward started to stuff his face he started coughing and I got scared." Oh my god Edward whats wrong?"  
_

_"Its just really spicy baby, how did you know I loved spicy food" He said with a hurt kind of smile it was truly comical._

_I know Edward and I know that as long a we have been dating he doesn't like spicy food it does bad things to his stomach. I smiled only my husband would say something like that to make me smile. I knew this would be the start of a beautiful marriage.I_

I sighed, when those thoughts came around the good times, bit by bit breaking me down and tearing away the new confidence that I have in myself. I skipped over bakery that was a particular occupation that I was not ready to have yet. They had an opening for a hair dresser, a server at a bar, and a cashier at a clothing store. I called the clothing store and asked about the job. The store manager Lisa told me that I could come in for an interview today. I knew this was the start an excellent start to the new life I was creating for myself.

* * *

A two months on to the job and I was really enjoying myself . My co-worker Anna whose sister I met at the meeting I went to Bree is breathe of fresh air she reminds me of Alice, and Rose together. I haven't spoken them in a little bit I've been so focused on getting my life together. She light hearted and serious a deadly combination if you ask me. After work when I was heading home around my second day of work she asked if I would like to join her for a cup of coffee , it was either that or sit a home , alone watching golden girls, so I gladly accepted. We have so much in common, she got married right out of high school to her long time boyfriend Richard they have one daughter named Samantha and they separate a few years back but, some how found their way back to each other. I would like to believe that everyone's relationships could go through such ruff patches and be repaired but my relationship wasn't one of them.

"So I see you got flowers again" Anna said as she was folding some shirts at a display table. "Jasper?" she asked.

"Yeah, hes really sweet" I smiled as I looked at the orange tulips he gave me.

"So how long have you guys been dating?" she smiled slyly " Is she getting any of the cookie yet".

"Anna, No" I exclaimed half laughing and half embarrassed. I haven't been with anyone like that since Edward except for B.O.B but, I mean I a woman I have needs and that is the easiest and simplest way to get my release. " Were not dating were just casual friends".

"Bella, when I was separated from my husband I had causal friends that bought me flowers and took me out because we were dating" she joked. "But, seriously Bella you go out with him almost every other night, He cooks you dinner, you go one double dates with my husband and I and hes meet Rose and Alice if that's not the definition of a boyfriend then I don't know what is" she called out to me as she carried some boxed into the stock room.

I thought about it Jasper was so different from Edward he was kind, loving and loyal he understood why I wanted to take things slow and didn't but any labels on anything. I was ready too to finally put the past behind me. I haven't talked to Edward in months and from what I heard around the neighborhood he was really talking his new roll as a father seriously. Well good for him.

" You're right he's my boyfriend" I sounded like a teenager but, I was fine with it.

* * *

We were going to be having dinner at his house tonight and I knew that I was ready to be with him in that way. I felt safe with him, beautiful and more like a woman . Since I got off of work early today I thought I would surprise him by showing up I wasn't prepared with what was about to happen, as I approached his door I heard voices in side.

"Jasper you need to tell her" the woman said.

"I know.. but, how I truly do care for her " he said.

"But you love me and I don't want to see her hurt she has been through so much this year and I can't be another reason to cause her pain".

I knew that voice... Alice.

* * *

**author's note- Holy shit an update lol hello fanfic this is my official welcome back I hope you guys are still interested in my stories and review and let me know. As for LET ME HEAR YOU SCREAM if any of you read that story please know that I am in the process of writing it and will have a new chapter up soon. Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES its a revenge story **

**Also does anyone remember when master of the universe was on fanfic lol saw the book 50 shades of grey in Barnes and nobles and thought that it was so crazy... Congrats E.L James**


	8. Sin and sinners

Summary- Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout there marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and their marriage.

There is something terribly morbid in the modern sympathy with pain.

One should sympathise with the colour, the beauty, the joy of life.

The less said about life's sores the better.- Oscar Wilde

Chapter Songs- Johnny Cash -Hurt

Joan Jett and the Black hearts- Crimson and Clover

Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES its a revenge story I think you might like it and HEARTS AFLAME.

* * *

I saw that the door was partially open so I decided to let myself in after all if they were having a conversation about me I might as well be present in it.

"Hello guys, what's going on" I said sweetly.

Alice gasped and Jasper looked shocked. I would have laughed at his face if I wasn't so mad and so over it at this point bit, I think what hurt the most was the fact that Alice my sister who was in my corner for my separation with Edward was doing the same thing to me.

"Bella this isn't what it looks like" Jasper said putting his hands up in defense.

"Really so this doesn't look like you and Alice are in here deciding on the future of your relationship and how you can break up with and still be with her" I said seething.

I really didn't want to be mad but, my anger over my own failed relationship was bringing up doubts in my head. _Is there something wrong with me, why do my relationships fail?_ Those doubts were not coming back again, I'm at a point in my life were I don't need the stress of this nonsense from anyone.

"Bells I'm so sorry, sweetie I never meant to hurt you" Alice begged.

"Really you're no better than Tanya in my mind. You know that if you wanted Jasper you should have said something in the beginning. I'm a grown woman Alice I can take rejection what I can't take is the lies".

"Bella please," Jasper began.

"Please don't give me that bullshit I wasn't born yesterday I know exactly what _that_ looks like. Please do you remember my husband?" I said seething

"Bella I love him and you may not understand this now but, I do he is my soul mate" She argued back. The fact that she was trying to justify her actions was getting me more upset than the fact that she was actually with my ex-boyfriend.

"Alice I have no words for you, you've been with me every step of the way you are my sister, my family you need to make a choice here what's it going to be" I looked at her.

"Bella please don't make her choose" he looked at me.

Alice looked from me to Jasper and I knew at that moment, all her hopes and dreams were written on her face as she stared at him.

"Fine" and with that I walked out the door effectively throwing two more people out my life .

* * *

"I can't believe she did that" Rose looked shocked.

"Well believe it" I replied back watching the golden girls on my flat screen. Blanche was talking about one of her many conquests and Dorothy was looking at her like she was a fool.

"Are you upset?"

"No, not really can I say that I'm shocked, no. Surprised may be a better word for what I'm feeling no matter what her excuse is Alice should have known better. I'm done looking pathetic and always accepting peoples apologizes and excuses. Do you know women everywhere are probably laughing at me? First, my husband cheats on me with a blonde bimbo, second my sister seduces my boyfriend and I'm not mad at all." I laughed "Rose does that make me crazy."

"No sweetie, I think that makes you brave" she smiled touching my hand.

"Rosie I don't want to ask but whose-"

"Bella, Ally was there for me at a time when I was so alone even before me and you got close again after college she was the only person that I could depend on when my parents-" I cut her off.

"Rosie you don't have to say anything I just wanted to know I had a feeling, so what's going on with you and Emmett?" I asked.

Rosalie blushed "He is an idiot, he always talking about our future" she said shaking her head. "We have no future"

"How long have you guys been dating Rosie" I said looking at her muting the TV.

"Four years" she said quietly.

"FOUR YEARS" I nearly screamed. "How could you keep that a secret from Edward and I don't you think we had a right to know?" I asked.

"Of course you did, I mean you still do."

"Were you ever going to tell us" I asked.

"We were going to tell you the night of your anniversary party but, with everything that has happened it never seemed right"

"Are you guys thinking about marriage" I asked.

"Of course we are, I love him so much it hurts Bella he is the reason why I wake up in the morning" she said unshed tears in her eyes.

"Sweetie so why don't you" I said grabbing hold of her hand.

"How awkward do you think that will be Edward will be his best man, you of course will be my maid of honor and Alice will be in the wedding party. How do you think it will be Emmett and I confessing our love to each other while our wedding party is fighting with each other? Please I don't need that kind of drama on my wedding day"

"Rose-" I started to reason with her but, she cut me off.

"Bella we've talked about this were basically married were moving in together soon when the time comes were we feel ready to have _everyone _we love there with no issues then we'll talk"

"Okey Dokey Rosie" I laughed.

"Bella don't you dare" she screamed as I dashed around my apartment.

"Ring around the Rosie a pocket full of posy ashes, ashes we all fall down" I screamed laughing.

"Bella" she jumped and tackled me.

"Loser buys dinner" she asked.

"You're on" and our thumb war began.

* * *

After drinking with me Rose decided to go home Emmett was lonely and she wanted to get in her freaky mode with Emmett. I laughed.

Maybe it was the wine but, it had me feeling frisky, I wanted to let loose and have fun. I took of my offending cloths and turned on some music. I was definitely the wine that had me giddy. Dancing around in silk is so sensual that it was amazing. There was a knock on the door and I almost missed it.

"Hello who's there?" I laughed my head was swimming. As I walked to the door I was shocked to see Edward.

"What are you doing here" I said trying to be angry but, I just kept giggling.

"Are you drunk Isabella" he said coming closer to me. I could smell the whiskey on his breathe.

I remembered all the good times I had with him I remember all the ways he used to touch me and make my body scream.

"I know that look" he whispered. "Do you want me?" he chuckled.

I forgot all about our problems for the time being and kissed him. I felt his hand all over my body as I dragged him inside my apartment slamming the door behind him.

Damn the consequences.

* * *

**author's note- Next chapter we will be hearing from edward and his side in this story Yes bella and edward will get back together. No the baby won't die but, I think what I have planned will shock some of you lol hope I'm keeping you all interested. LET ME HEAR YOU SCREAM WILL BE UPDATED SOOM IF YOU NEVER READ IT BY ALL MEANS PLEASE CHECK IT OUT ALSO CHECK OUT WHITE LIES AND HEARTS AFLAME. SEE YA SOON**

**-JAZZBERRY**

**ONE OF MY REVIEWS WROTE THE POWER OF FANFICTION AND SHE IS SO RIGHT I REMEMBER FOURTEEN THAT WAS A FANFIC AND IS A PUBLISHED STORY ON AMAZON SOME AMAZING WRITERS ARE GETTING THE CHANCE TO SHINE AND I'M SAYING CONGRATS TO YOU ALL MUCH LOVE AND RESPECT.**


	9. The morning after

summary Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout their marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and their marriage.

Shoot for the moon if you miss you'll land among the stars"- unknown

Chapter songs Simple and clean utada hikaru

Suna no oshiro- kanon wakeshima

**Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES it's a revenge story I think you might like it and HEARTS AFLAME support all my stories Please and Thank You.**

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Pounding...numbing...pounding. I awoke slowly to a pounding headache, my head is throbbing and I fell like I can't breathe. I rolled over on my bed and felt a warm body next to me "What the fuck?" I thought and quickly jumped out of the bed pulling the sheet over my body. My eyes traveled up the hair leg to the toned body that I knew very well. Edward Cullen.

"Edward, wake up please" I said in a no non-sense voice.

Edward didn't move an inch and I remember always getting frustrated in the mornings when I would have to get him up and he would be dead as a log.

"Edward get your ass up now!" I angrily yelled grabbing a pillow and throwing it at his head.

"God bells, it early stop it" He grumbled.

"No get the hell up now!".

"Okay..Okay" he said stretching and yawning. Edward ran his hand through his already unruly hair and looked at me. His bright green eyes were shinning so brightly that I was almost shocked for a moment. He looked happy.

"Do you want me to make breakfast?" He asked getting out the bed, fully nude.

"AHH!" I yelled quickly putting my back towards him "Put some cloths on please".

"Bella we were married for 7 years I think you know what I look like naked". He said slyly as he put on boxers.

"6 years" I corrected.

"7 years " He argued back.

"6 you cheated on me for 3 and we were dating long before so it seems like we've been together for a long time right".

Edward stared at me with a blank face before giving me a dazzling heart breaking smile that any simple girl would fall over. After being married and cheated on by this asshole I'm immune to his bullshit charms anymore.

"Before we start with the heavy stuff I want some breakfast you want anything".

I opened my mouth to tell him no but, nothing came out it felt so strange acting normal.

"Two eggs scrambled, cheese , bacon on a raisin bagel" he said walking to the kitchen.

I quickly followed behind him but, stopped to put on a t-shirt and some sweat pants I had lying around. Edward was at the stove cooking and it smelled delicious. It felt like old times except the part were I was always cooking and Edward was on his phone trying to work out something. The cynical part of me laughed at how ironic it was to have my ex-husband in here cooking like everything was resolved and we were fine.

"Here ya go" he said putting the plate in front of me as I sat on the table. I grabbed some forks, and cups and sat back down at the table. Edward quickly sat down behind and smiled.

"This is different huh?" I said as I began to dig into my breakfast.

"Different good or different bad?" he questioned.

"Its uh different".

Edward sighed and put down his fork "Look Bella I know were not going to go skipping into the sunset but, I hoped last was a step forward in our relationship".

"Edward I was drunk last night anything we did didn't mean anything. I wasn't in a right state of mind."

"Please Bella" He argued "I remember when you got claimed you got drunk at my mother's birthday and if I remember correctly you only had one drink and it was a virgin margarita mind you".

I stared at him for a moment and laughed "I've missed this part of this"

"Me too" he agreed.

"But I have to be honest this doesn't change anything, what I would like is for us to be friends if anything but I can't see myself being with you like that again. I hope you know that right".

"Bella I want my family back and I've been working on myself" Edward grabbed my hands across the table " I know I've made a mistake and I've realized what I want and it may not be where you at right now but I'll wait for you as long as it takes".

"I may never get there, I saying this cause I don't want their to be any misunderstandings between us". I explained as nicely as I could.

"Bella I know what I want. I realized what I lost and I can't believe how stupid I was. Wen you have the person you know you are meant to be with and after you lose that person you realize it, it kinda makes you think you know".

I couldn't say anything lately thoughts like this have been running through my head but, I won't let myself think about it. Why go through this again and rehash those feelings.

"So what happened with you and Tanya" I asked I was honestly curious ..

"Wow" he nervously chuckled "I didn't think you would ever want to know about that".

"I do what's going on?" I asked.

" Well I've set up a room for him in the house" he said quickly.

"Our house?"

"Yea" he said nervously.

"Oh".

"Don't worry Bella I had an addition added on to the house its a good size room. We're having a boy"

"Congrats" I could stop the lump that formed in my throat "Are you thinking about getting with her for the sake of your child?"

"No, absolutely not" he said firmly "Tanya and I had a sexual relationship and she is a wonderful person but, I'm not willing to spend the rest of my life with her"

"What are her thoughts"

"Shes upset but, it is what it is. The only thing that I'm concerned about is my child and you". He smiled softly.

I heard the familiar ringtone of Edward's cellphone and I knew what was coming. Edward quickly answered it and got dressed. "Bella I have to go to the clinic a doctor called out and were short can we finish this some other time".

"Sure"

As I closed the door behind him I plopped down on my couch and thought what the fuck just happened.

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**author's note- Next chapter we will be hearing from edward and his side in this story Yes bella and edward will get back together. No the baby won't die but, I think what I have planned will shock some of you lol hope I'm keeping you all interested. LET ME HEAR YOU SCREAM WILL BE UPDATED SOON MY SCHOOL SCHEDULE IS KINDA CRAZY AS A THEATER ARTS MAJOR I'M ALWAYS BUSY IF YOU NEVER READ IT BY ALL MEANS PLEASE CHECK IT OUT ALSO CHECK OUT WHITE LIES AND HEARTS AFLAME. SEE YA SOON**

**FOR THE PEOPLE WHO DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY PLEASE DON'T REVIEW I DON'T APPRECIATE IT. I BELIEVE THAT IT IS UNCALLED FOR AND EXTREMELY RUDE. AS FAR AS MY UPDATING SCHEDULE WHEN I CAN I CAN I HAVE A LIFE OUTSIDE OF FANFICTION AND ALTHOUGH MY STORIES ARE IMPORTANT TO ME THEY ARE NOT EVERYTHING PLEASE UNDERSTAND THAT**

**-JAZZBERRY**


	10. If I didn't know better

summary Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout their marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and their marriage.

"Life is like a box of chocolates you never know what you'll get" Forest Gump

Chapter songs Stand By Me Ben E. King

**Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES it's a revenge story I think you might like it and HEARTS AFLAME support all my stories Please and Thank You.**

* * *

Edward

"So Mrs. Moore can you tell me what's wrong with Ben" I asked as I put the stethoscope to his chest and, checked his breathing and, his heart rate".

"Well he has difficulty feeding" she sniffled "He also has a cough, fever, and, runny nose".

I put the stethoscope down and, touched his head and, his neck. "Well I'm going to take his temperature but, I think I know what it is"

"What is it?" Mrs. Moore cried.

"Well he has what we like to call respiratory syncytial virus or RSV. Its basically the equivalent of the common cold for babies. You can give him children's ibuprofen for the fever and it should take care of everything if he is still feeling bad come back and, see me in a week" I smiled at her as I handed her Ben. "Keep in touch Amanda don't be afraid to call me if you're afraid something is wrong".

"Thank you doctor Cullen" she smiled happily nuzzling his chest.

As I escort them out I saw Tanya sitting there with, hands folded over her bulging belly.

"Edward since you won't answer my phone calls I've decided to come to you're office".

"Really were doing this at my job now?" I asked helping her up out of the chair and, walking to my office. I heard Tanya close the door behind her and, sit down in the chair in front of my desk.

"So how has everything been" I asked.

"Stop being so formal with me Edward after all I am having your child" she huffed. " You've never did call me back why is that?".

"Tanya if it doesn't have anything to do with the baby why are you calling me" I sighed rubbing my head.

"Aren't you even going to try to build a family with us?"she questioned me "Don't you even want to provide a family for your son?" She asked.

I sighed again and rubbed my head " Tanya I don't want to be with you as fucked up as this sounds I can't".

"Because you wan't to be with your ex wife. Ex Wife Edward" Tanya said anger apparent in the tone of her voice "What woman in her right mind would take you back after you blatantly cheated on her for not one, not two , but, three years. You flaunted it in her face everyone knew about me I wasn't a secret in a closet you wanted her to know. You got me pregnant by the way and, now you tell me you don't want our family and you want her".

"Look I know I have no redeemable qualities about myself and I'm not prefect at all but, I'm doing the best I can day by day." I ran my hands through my hair "Every woman in america probably hates me right?" I joked.

"Not every woman" Tanya said quietly. "Edward I love you, you know I love you. I'm seven months pregnant I want you to be their when he is born."

"And you don't need to worry about that I will be there" I told her honestly " I needed to ask you will he be taking my last name or yours?"

She looked at me like I had to heads. " Edward I wouldn't take that away from you".

"Tanya I have other appointments I only have a couple of minutes left is their anything else we need to talk about?". I asked getting up out the chair and walking over to help her up as well. She wobbled to the door and began to open it but, stopped.

"I'm not giving up Edward, Bella will never take you back you are far to broken just like m. Damaged people always attract each other". She said walking out the door. I stopped for a minute and thought about all that she said. Maybe I am delusional, damn like is so crazy for me right now.

* * *

Tanya

Its been a few weeks since I was at Edward's clinic and, nothing has changed he still is ignoring me unless it has something to do with the baby. I was so far behind that I didn't even get his nursery ready but, it was difficult with me living in a tiny one bedroom apartment. I had to find a new place to live but, with me being on maternity leave I had to pinch and save anything I got. I left Edward a message asking him would he like to help me set up the nursery when I got around to it he said to let him know. Lately I've been an emotional roller coaster the baby is coming soon and, I'm not mentally or emotionally prepared for him. I always want the real deal with Edward. Married, our kids playing in the yard and were happy but, as the days keep going that dream is slowly fading into a stupid fantasy that a teenage girl created. I could stand the sound of the silence in my house so I got in my car and drove to the store. It was only six blocks away and, I desperately need to clear my head. As I entered the store I seen a familiar brunette Isabella Swan. This woman is bane of my existence. If she wasn't around Edward would want our happy home and, maybe I would finally get some peace but, I scold myself because every time those thoughts come in my head I think that what if I was in her position, what if I was the wife. I began to follow her around the store watching every move she made. I always wondered what Edward saw in her and, I could never see anything special.

"Why are you following me Tanya" Bella announced suddenly turning around.

"I wanted to take a good look at you and, ask you what does he see in you?" I asked.

"Who" She said confused.

"You know who" I said getting annoyed.

Comprehension dawn on her and, she sighed "Look I have nothing to say to you and personally I'm in the mood to deal with you today". Bella began to walk away leaving me standing in the isle like a fool and I would not give up I needed answers.

"Do you even love him?" I called out.

She stopped and turned around and, stared at me like I had two heads and, then the next thing I knew I felt a sharp sting across my cheek" You have some fucking nerve to question me about whether or not I love my ex- husband or not. Who are you but, some whore who got pregnant and, is under the delusion that he will marry you someday. News flash bimbo the mistress never wins in the end."

"If you handled your business like a woman he never would have came to me." I challenged.

She laughed at me in cynical sort of way "Is that all you can keep saying to me yes I made some mistakes but, I'm woman enough to admit it personally I don't give a flying fuck what you think of me. Any mistakes made in my marriage were mine to make why because I was his wife, me. You will never no matter how hard to try reach him but, you know what I've come to a point where none of this matters not you, Edward any of this."

I stared at the blank emotionless face that was in front of me and, this was not what I wanted to do cause a scene, upset us both. "I'm sorry Bella, I don't know what else to say".

"I'm going to say this one to you, enjoy your kid Tanya because at the end of the day your going to have someone who's going to love you unconditionally be grateful."

And with that she walked away and, I couldn't stop the tears that kept coming down my eyes, at what point do I become happy. I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and my world turned black the last thing I heard was Isabella Swan yelling my name

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**author's note- I know updating has been so bad but, I promise to get better White lies should be updated soon and Let me hear you scream is in the process right now so give it a few weeks. To the reviewer who let me know you recommended my story in a forum thank you so much! I'm glad people are starting to come around to my story I know alot of people got emotional and that can be a good and bad thing but, the support and love that I have received has been amazing so again thank you for taking the time to read it!**

**-JAZZBERRY**


	11. Life is strange sometimes

summary Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout their marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and their marriage.

"Shoot for the moon if you miss you'll land among the stars"- Unknown

Chapter song Because- The Beatles

**Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES it's a revenge story I think you might like it and HEARTS AFLAME support all my stories Please and Thank You.**

**Three point of views in this chapter this is the first and probably last time this is happening **

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Bella

The word karma was floating in my head as I rode in the emergency truck to the hospital but, I quickly squashed down that vicious thought that almost consumed me. _Why am I here? _I kept thinking as I stared at her pale face as sweat dotted her brow, I frowned. I had called Edward to tell him what was going on because, I assumed he would be worried if something happened to his child. As the emt's hooked Tanya up to the machinery and checked her pulse I sat there and, watched thinking back to my experience. Panicking and, crying I sighed now was not the time to dwell on the past.

"Are you her sister ma'am?" One of the emt workers asked.

"No I'm not I'm just a good Samaritan" I lied quickly looking down at my hands. What the the hell was I supposed to say _" This is the woman who stole my husband and tried to harass me in the store. She passed out and I tried to walk away but,I felt bad so I came along for the ride and now I'm as lost as you are_". But, you can't say that without looking like an ass. "I just want to see if she's okay" I said honestly.

"That's really nice ma'am not to many people would take time out of their day to help another person" He smiled at me.

The rest of the ride was quiet and, it seemed like the longest ride of my life. As the van pulled up to the back doors and they rushed her out I quickly jumped out behind them trailing as they went. I called Edward again this time leaving him another message.

"Hey Edward it umm... Bella look Tanya is in the hospital and, she passed out in the supermarket I just thought you would like to know were at the hospital now. The one of Fifth and Carlton.. Alright bye." As I hung up I saw Edward damn near running through the door.

"Bella!?" He said shock evident in his voice " What are you doing here?"

"Didn't you get any of my messages I called you".

"No, I didn't" He said frowning slightly.

"So how did you find out about Tanya?" I asked.

"Marissa came into the clinic and, told me while I was about to go out for lunch I dropped everything and, came here. I tried Forks General first before I came here. Should have known that no one goes there anymore. People would die basically waiting to see a doctor the lines are so long."

"Well they just took her to the back so I'll be going now". I said quickly as I turned and, began to walk away.

"Bella!" He called out quickly "Thank you, I know you didn't have to say with her but, I appreciate it so much."

"I'm not a monster Edward but, you're welcome" I smiled slightly as I continued to walk away.

I sighed as I began the trek back to the supermarket along the way I kept thinking what if she loses her child would I be happy, sad, indifferent to it all . I shook my head trying to clear those thoughts from my mind. All I know is that I better be getting brownie points in heaven. As I was walking my phone began to ring and, I glanced at the screen and frowned as I answered it.

"Hello Alice what do you want?".

* * *

Edward

I watched as Bella walked away and, couldn't even process what just happened. _She took care of Tanya _I thought. Wow was the only word that formulate in my brain but, I couldn't even continue to process is because my whole focus was on my child that was in danger. I rushed to the reception desk and, asked the lady about Tanya.

"Sixth floor, room 341" she said quickly brushing me aside.

I got into the elevator and it felt like the longest ride of my life. Everyone kept stopping on a floor and, I was getting more antsy and, nervous that I wasn't going to get their in time. When I finally reached the floor I quickly walked to room 341 and, saw a doctor there".

"Excuse me, can I help you sir?" The doctor asked as she looked at Tanya's clip board.

"I'm Edward Cullen I"m with her" I said pointing at Tanya like a fool.

"The concerned father?" she smiled at me.

I nodded my head again like a fool not really knowing what to say to her " Is she alright, is she hurt, is their something wrong with the baby?". I fired off question after question never really giving the doctor a chance to speak.

"Slow down Mr. Cullen , Ms. Denali is alright she just passed out from stress that all. I recommend that she take it easy and, relax. She doesn't need to over exert herself at this time. " She smiled " And the baby is perfectly health you can relax now Mr. Cullen your family is fine".

I smiled "Thank you, so much"

"It's my job"" she replied happily as she started to walk away. "Are you by any chance the Edward Cullen who opened up the private clinic?".

"Yes, I am" I answered back.

"I've heard good things keep up the good work" she said as she walked away.

I looked around the room and found a chair in the corner and, grabbed it sitting it by the bed. I stared at her pale face and, then looked down at her stomach and sighed thinking about everything and coming up with the best answer I could, Life is strange sometimes.

* * *

Tanya

Everything is weightless and, I can feel myself being moved. "I'm floating"I thought foolishly I felt like a feather and, it was all so peaceful until I heard Bella call my name. Why is she calling me I thought. It was all so strange I thought I've never been in a situation like this.

"God damn it" I heard Bella swear as I felt a hand on my head "Hold on Tanya, if you can hear me I called the ambulance and, they will be here as fast as the can alright."

Bella is helping me I know I must have died. I was in and, out in the ambulance but, I could have sworn I heard the emt ask her is she my sister. What a joke Isabella and I related someone must be joking. When I woke up I saw Edward sitting in a chair by my bed.

"Edward, where am I?" I asked confused.

"You're at the hospital Tanya you fainted in the supermarket apparently." He said running his hands through his hair.

"I'm sorry" I whispered quietly.

"Why the hell are you apologizing to me" He laughed " You're the one who fainted but, thank god your okay and so is the baby" he smiled grasping my left hand.

My right hand immediately went to my stomach and, I began to cry softly to myself. Happy that the baby was okay and that the one thing in my life what going right so far.

"What wrong?" he asked concerned " Do you want me to call the doctor in here for you?.

"No don't I'm just glad that your here" I smiled grateful that I didn't have to go through this alone.

"You're welcome Tanya." Edward let go off my hand and, I felt so empty that I wanted to cry all over again. "Tanya I never really apologized to you for dragging you into this mess that is my life did I? he questioned looking at me.

"No you didn't but, you don't have to Edward because if none of this happened we wouldn't have our child".

"Tanya you deserve a person who wants to be with you. Who will love you and treat you like a your the most precious thing in the world." he said his green eyes boring into mine.

"What are you saying Edward" I said panicking.

"I"m saying is that I want you to find someone who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. When I first meet you, you were a strong confident woman who didn't let anything stand in her way. You were determined and, that's what I liked about you, what I still like about you but, it seems like you lost yourself along the way chasing after me and I need you to devote the time and, energy you waste on me on our child."

"Edward- please wha-" he cut me off.

"Let me finish. The way I've treated you and Bella is horrible. This last year has been a hell and, this kid is the only good thing in my fucked up life. Tanya I want us to be the best parents we can to this baby agreed" He smiled softly grasping my hand once more.

I felt better I didn't want to hear what he was saying but, some of what he was saying was sticking to me. "Agreed"

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**author's note- I know updating has been so bad but, I promise to get better White lies should be updated soon and Let me hear you scream is in the process right now so give it a MORE few weeks. CHECK OUT MY OTHER STORIES AS WELL AS THIS ONE PLEASE! In honor of Breaking dawn part 2 being released I rushed this chapter for this wonderful weekend. I saw the movie and the twist had me crying for a moment anyone else agree. One reviewer asked me is this really a Bella and Edward story it is and I know it may not seem like it but, I did write from the beginning B/E/T = Bella, Edward, Tanya this story center around the three of them but, the bases of the story is the relationship of these two people that was so broken and is trying to repair itself. I'm trying to humanize them because the way I see it is we are all flawed. To answer another reviewer who pm'ed me asking me where did i come up with this idea. Well I've said before I know someone this happened to and they over came all of the cheating and the hurt. When I asked her how could she forgive him like any sane person would ^_^ after everything he did she said life is funny and the road we travel is long and bumpy and sometimes we have to travel down it to find out what we really want out of life. We make mistakes along the way and veer off path but, we always find our way home. Hope that answers some questions if you have any leave it in the comments or pm me and I'll answer it in my Author's Note. **

**-JAZZBERRY**


	12. Reality check

summary Isabella Swan has been married to her husband Edward Cullen for 6 years. She has had to deal with his infidelity throughout their marriage. Sick and tired of it she asks for a divorce not before getting into a near fatal accident. Now watch as they try to rebuild there lives and their marriage.

"Shoot for the moon if you miss you'll land among the stars"- Unknown

Chapter song Heart Attack- Trey Songz

**Also please check out my new story WHITE LIES it's a revenge story I think you might like it and BUTTERFLIES AND HURRICANES support all my stories Please and Thank You.**

**Three point of views in this chapter this is the first and probably last time this is happening **

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Rosalie

The rift in our family was a plain as day and everyone could see it. Alice and Bella haven't been speaking and when they have it just ended up in a shouting match. I felt that I had to be the voice of reason but, I kept thinking to myself every time I wanted to intervene, Why. That three letter word flowed in my head as I thought of my favorite cousins. My life to tell you the truth has been going extremely well no drama, good paying job that allowed me to live comfortable, and a boyfriend (well sort of). Emmett and I we've come to a strange place in our budding relationship where I wanted to give us a shot but, he was against it saying that with already so much tension it would ruffle to many feathers, I disagreed but, what can I say that he wasn't right because he was. It felt wrong at times to be happy because that meant for me that I was accepting what was happening around me.

"Rose are you okay?" Emmett asked as e grasped my hand across the table.

"Yeah I'm fine" I smiled half- heartily.

"You just seem lost in your thoughts that's all" He said taking a sip of his coffee.

Emmett decided to meet me for lunch. I used to meet Bella or Alice once every few days just to catch up and chat but, for the past few months they've been all about them, now Bella had an excuse with her divorce and all but, Alice no she was to busy caught up in her new found relationship and probably thought that I was going to judge her, which I was. What she did to her sister was a complete joke I mean are you fucking kidding me to know what she was been through to get a guy and steal him away like that whore Tanya was unacceptable in my book.

"No just worried about my cousin." I took a sip of my tea and set the cup down and glanced out the window.

"Which one?" He asked curiously.

"Bella of course" I said quickly "Alice can kick rocks."

"Rose-" Emmett began but I quickly cut him off.

"Please don't start she knows what she did, she made a _that_ decision as an adult and has to live with that fact if she thinks I'm going to embrace her and that scumbag boyfriend of hers she has another thing coming"

"Hey" he grasped my hand again "It's me your talking to, its okay."

"No it not okay Emmett look at whats happen this past year nothing but, chaos and craziness. Our lives have all been affected by this and that the reason you and I can't" I stopped myself before I became upset again.

"Rose please don't go there you know why we can't" Emmett sighed shaking his head.

"I know, I know but it still hurts" I glanced down at my hands and sighed. "How you shit faced brother?"

Emmett laughed " I think relatively okay for the most part business is doing well."

"Well that's good hope he makes extra money so he can take care of his mistress and her brat" I said off handedly.

Emmett's boyish face became serious and dark " Look I know how you feel about Tanya and believe me she's not getting in votes coming from me but, that's my nephew or niece your talking about. Like it or not that baby is apart of my family and I'll be damned if I sit here and let you bash a kid who did nothing wrong and didn't ask to be born in a shitty situation so stop it."

"Look I'm sorry" I started but, the damage was already done.

"Look I gotta get back to work okay" He said getting up and putting on his suit jacket he walked around the table and gave me a kiss on the check "I'll take care of lunch you just get back to work safe okay".

And with that Emmett Cullen left me sitting there speechless in a cafe.

_Now Tanya's issues are messing with my damn life _

* * *

Alice

"Hey Babe are you okay" Jasper asked shutting of the tv and looking over to me " You've been washing that same plate for 15 minutes, what's up?"

"Oh" I said looking down at my pruned hands "Sorry I just have alot on my mind"

I turned off the faucet and dried my wet hands and went to go sit next to him on the couch. Our relationship was going strong and I have never been happier he gets me and I mean _really _gets me the good, bad, and ugly but, the way our relationship started would forever be a thorn in my side that just won't go were days when I looked in the mirror and could barely recognize myself and I hated it. Bella and I have barely had a full conversation without it turning into a screaming match, no matter how many times I would apologize or plead with her to talk to me it always ended the same, with a door slammed in my face or both of us walking away and that was months ago.

I walked over to the couch he was sitting on and crawled next to him snuggling in his side "What's wrong?" he whispered peppering kisses along my temple.

"I was just thinking that I need to make peace with my sister"

Jasper ran his hands along the side of my arm "Love you know I"m all for it, I would also like to apologize to Bella for what happened"

Suddenly I didn't feel like snuggling anymore. I pushed Jasper off of me and got it. "I don't think that would be a good idea"

"Why not?" he questioned, looking at me.

"Because its bad enough she's not talking to me, I don't need you around to be another reminder" The more I thought about my current situation the more frustrated I became.

"Alice I think you need to calm down, your acting crazy" he looked at me, his blue eyes pleading with me to calm down, I wasn't having any of it.

"Acting crazy, your family is still speaking to you. My sister and my cousin barely talk to me I'm alone"

"Stop being dramatic, you still have your mom"

"My mom is so disappointed in me she won't talk to me till I break up with you" By now tears were rolling down my face.

"What the hell do you think you're the only one whose hurt, I hate seeing you this way" Jasper tried to hug my but, I slapped his hands away. "Alice do you regret us being together?"

"At times I do, look at this were wrapped in our own little bubble, I'm extremely close with my family and I messed that for you, I'm not a cheater"

"Well neither am I" he was clearly offended by the look on his face "Look I admit the way we came together is less than conventional but, I care about you Alice deeply"

"I care about you too but, Jazz look at this, lately I've been questioning everything, you know"

He smiled, though it didn't reach his eyes, he slowly approached me wrapping his arms around my waist. "Ally cat things get worse before they get better"

"I know, Jasper" I sighed thinking _I know..._

* * *

Emmett

Driving to my brother's house was bittersweet. I remember the family bbq's we would have, Friday night get together but, unfortunately that all came crashing down when my brother decided to stick his dick in Tanya. Just her name got me upset, not that she is solely to blame my brother is a grown man he knew what he was doing, and now their is a child involved. As I pulled into the drive way the beautiful house was lite up like Bella still lived there. I quickly shut the car off and walked to the front door ringing the bell.

"Who is it" Edward called on the other side.

"The only person who will visit your dumbass" Sarcasm dripping from my voice.

He quickly unlocked the door ushering me inside, I followed him and shut the door behind me. "Don't you feel uncomfortable sleeping here at night"

"It's my own kind of penance in a way" he smiled in a self deprecating way.

Edward walked into the living room and sat down on the couch putting his feet on the coffee table. I followed suit and sat across from him.

"Edward, I think you should sell this house"

He looked at me and rolled his eyes "This house is all I have left, besides the memories"

"Yeah and I don't think that's healthy for you, I'm mean all you do is work and come home"

"Doing other things got me in trouble in the first place"

"Look you and Bella's problems are affecting us all man and you staying in a house that you shared with your ex-wife is like some weird shrine to her, hell nothing in here has change you guys are divorced you need to let it go" I sighed.

"I can't" he rubbed his face.

"Why not"

"Because" he stopped and looked at me, shaking his head and looked at me. "How's things going with that dragon you call a woman"

I laughed and leaned back in the chair "Angry as every, man she's amazing but, lately things have been at a stalemate"

"Because of Bella and I?" Edward asked.

I looked at him and looked away.

"Emmett look just bec-" He was interrupted by a knock on the front door. "Emmett can you get the door I have to use the bathroom"

"Yeah" As Edward walked down the hall into the bathroom I walked to the front door and saw that familiar blonde who was quickly becoming the bane of my life: Tanya

"Emmett" she stared at me looking left and right any where but, my eyes.

"Is Edward here?" she looked so innocent but, I knew better she was just another member in the guilty party.

I moved out the way and watched her waddle her way in my ex- sister in laws house.

"So why are you here?" I asked closing the door behind me and walking right behind her.

"I needed to talk to Edward" she said glancing over her shoulder looking at me.

"That's what the telephone is for, I know you have one" I said nonchalantly.

"Is there something you would like to say to me" she said angrily.

"Oh Tanya there is alot I would like to say to you, but my mother taught me to respect women" I smiled.

"Look I know you're on _her _side but, I"m try to respect the fact that I'm sorry"

"Try and respect the fact that you broke up a marriage, and managed to get yourself pregnant" I sighed rubbing my face " I'm sorry"

"Look we can't help who we love" she said looking down a her feet.

"I know"

I don't know how long I stood their in the foyer, the awkward silence enveloping us but, I had enough "Look tell Edward I'll see him later"

And with that I walked out of my brothers house

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**I know its been a while since I've updated but yeah lol :) hope you guys liked the chapter I have a new story and I'm going to post a sneak peek here Its called BUTTERFLIES AND HURRICANES **

I sat at my desk my, with my hands on the keys and sighed. My thought process was completely fried I couldn't even think of one character to write for the new movie I was thinking of shooting. _Shoot writer's block!_

I freaking hate writers block because it could be weeks before a good film idea came to me, I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. I began to click on the projects I've done this summer and I couldn't see any progression. I had a vision of what I wanted to accomplish this year, what I wanted to create but, what was in my head couldn't translate into my film.

"Bella School, now" My dad called from down stairs.

I twirled around in swirly chair and looked at my poster of Hitchcock when I was brain dead; like I am right now he always usually gave me some inspiration.

#

I've learned that if you give words power then and only then can they hurt you. I'm not a size four and as much as I wished in the past that I was skinny I so over that phase in my life. I'm a size 16 and yes I'm a plus size person and proud. When my weight started becoming an issue in 6th grade my mom told me to go on a diet, what kind of mom tells an 11 year old to go on a diet, what do you think that does for a kids self –esteem, needless to say I didn't stick my finger down my throat and kept eating ding dongs and here I am today.

**I hope you guys check it out and support my other stories and enjoy it really different. Also I hoped everyone had a merry Christmas hoped it was fun!**


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